When to leave?
1. When you have to visit her on the same day each week.
2. When the agency receptionist says you wanna see your girlfriend
3. When you've memorized her measurements, and there is no new colours at LaSenza
4. When she says this is our song.
5. When you're in public and someone older approaches you and says are you newlyweds.
6. When her 19 year old daughter starts hitting on you, and eventually you cave and fornicate with her daughter. NOT AT THE SAME TIME! :razz:
6. When she shows up at your door and confronts you about doing the tummy tango with her daughter, and then takes all her sexually frustration out on you having crazy, wild monkey sex and your neighbours hear all. Then while doin' the cuddlyfuck, she asks "I'm better than my daughter right!"
7. When she shows up, in her pyjama pants and the sweatshirt you let her have one evening when it was chilly. She did have a really sexy nightie on underneath.
8. When you're in a posh hotel getting ready for an evening out and she's putting her make-up on while you're takin' a dump, and she says "We're like an old married couple!" and you reply, "You take so long with your make-up that you'd be late for your own funeral!"
9. When she tells you about this puppy she wants, and you drive her 2 hours both ways, and the dog becomes CUJO and she has to get rid of it.
10. When you haven't heard from or seen her in 4 months, and she shows up at your door and says, "I'm in love with you!" RUN FOR THE HILLS. But, have crazy, wild monkey sex with her first. You know one last tappin' of that ass!
Most importantly when your friend calls her woodchuck, listen to your friend! Whew!