Aunt Judy (No offence Judy)

[Antonia Jones]

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to

tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day the kids

came back and one by one began to tell their stories.



Laura said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg laying hens.

One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat

of the car when we hit a big bump in the road and all the eggs went

flying and broke and made a mess."



"What's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher.



"Don't put all your eggs in one basket!"



"Very good," said the teacher.



Next little Sarah raised her hand and said, "Our family are farmers too.

But we raise chickens for the meat market. We had a dozen eggs one time,

but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks, and the moral to this

story is, "don't count your chickens before they're hatched."



"That was a fine story Sarah. Neil, do you have a story to share?"



"Yes, my daddy told me this story about my Aunt Judy. Aunt Judy was a

flight engineer in the Gulf War and her plane got hit. She had to bail out

over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whiskey, a machine

gun and a machete. She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't

break and then she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. She

killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets.

Then she killed twenty more with the machete until the blade broke and

then she killed the last ten with her bare hands."



"Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "what kind of moral did your

daddy tell you from that horrible story?"



"Stay the hell away from Aunt Judy when she's been drinking."[sm=eeeK.gif]


[sm=1syellow1.gif][sm=1syellow1.gif][sm=1syellow1.gif][sm=1syellow1.gif][sm=1syellow1.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=1syellow1.gif][sm=1syellow1.gif][sm=1syellow1.gif][sm=1syellow1.gif]

 

[unzwkcgc]

lol Thanks Mark that made me chuckle

L&L

MC

 

[dccgirly1862]

Very good. Thats made my day.

 

[BastBeast]

Now Mark,

You naughty boy! [sm=nono.gif]

What a slur on my fine character! [sm=wasntmesign.gif]

I wouldn't mind, but I'm non-violent AND teetotal!! [sm=sad2.gif] [sm=mecry.gif]

I was looking for something to make a friend laugh and anyone who knows me would laugh at this, so thanks.

[sm=wave.gif]

Judy [sm=animal-smiley-021.gif]