AUTO REPAIR
>
>A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.
>
>After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
>She says, "What's the story?"
>He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor."
>She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
>----------------------------------------
>SPEEDING TICKET
>
>A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he
>could see her license.
>She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just
>yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to
>you!"
>--------------------------
>
>EXPOSURE
>
>A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right
>breast hanging out.
>A policeman approaches her and says, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite
>you for indecent exposure?"
>She says, "Why, officer?"
>"Because your breast is hanging out." He sa! ys.
>She looks down and says, "OH MY GOD, I left the baby on the bus again!"
>-------------------------------------------
>RIVER WALK
>
>There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another
>blonde on the opposite bank.
>"Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "how can I get to the other side?"
>The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back,
>"You ARE on the other side."
>------------------------------------
>KNITTING
>
>A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
>Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was
>knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren,
>the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL
>OVER!"
>"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "it's A SCARF!"
>---------------------------------------
>
>BLONDE ON THE SUN
>
>A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
>The Russian said, 'We were the first in space!"
>The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
>The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
>The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.
>"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
>To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at
>night!"
>
>------------------------------------
>IN A VACUUM
>
>A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled
>the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was:
>"If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
>She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
>
>-------------------------------------
>FINAL EXAM
>
>The blonde reported for her university final examination that consists of
>yes/no type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at
>the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of inspiration, takes
>out her purse, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking the answer
>sheet: Yes, for Heads, and No, for Tails.
>Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still
>sweating it out. During the last few minutes she is seen desperately throwing
>the coin, muttering and sw eating. The moderator, alarmed, approaches her
>and asks what is going on. "I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm
>rechecking my answers."
>-----------------------------------------------------
>
>Subject: THE BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR - SO FAR
>
>A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blond female
>neighbor came out of the ho
>
>A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.
>
>After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
>She says, "What's the story?"
>He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor."
>She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
>----------------------------------------
>SPEEDING TICKET
>
>A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he
>could see her license.
>She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just
>yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to
>you!"
>--------------------------
>
>EXPOSURE
>
>A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right
>breast hanging out.
>A policeman approaches her and says, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite
>you for indecent exposure?"
>She says, "Why, officer?"
>"Because your breast is hanging out." He sa! ys.
>She looks down and says, "OH MY GOD, I left the baby on the bus again!"
>-------------------------------------------
>RIVER WALK
>
>There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another
>blonde on the opposite bank.
>"Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "how can I get to the other side?"
>The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back,
>"You ARE on the other side."
>------------------------------------
>KNITTING
>
>A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
>Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was
>knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren,
>the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL
>OVER!"
>"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "it's A SCARF!"
>---------------------------------------
>
>BLONDE ON THE SUN
>
>A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
>The Russian said, 'We were the first in space!"
>The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
>The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
>The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.
>"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
>To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at
>night!"
>
>------------------------------------
>IN A VACUUM
>
>A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled
>the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was:
>"If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
>She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
>
>-------------------------------------
>FINAL EXAM
>
>The blonde reported for her university final examination that consists of
>yes/no type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at
>the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of inspiration, takes
>out her purse, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking the answer
>sheet: Yes, for Heads, and No, for Tails.
>Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still
>sweating it out. During the last few minutes she is seen desperately throwing
>the coin, muttering and sw eating. The moderator, alarmed, approaches her
>and asks what is going on. "I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm
>rechecking my answers."
>-----------------------------------------------------
>
>Subject: THE BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR - SO FAR
>
>A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blond female
>neighbor came out of the ho