I consider myself a connoisseur of Thai massage. Finding the right masseuse is every bit as important to me as finding the right bargirl, if not more so.
In the past I have had tremendous luck in finding great massuesses, having had difficulty only on Tour 3. On my just-finished tour, I realized just how lucky I ahve been, because I went through a couple dozen who were mediocre or worse before I finally found a great one in BKK. I am not saying her name or where I found her, because it was, oddly enough, the least expensive place I went to, and if more people find out about her, the price is sure to go up!!
As far as happy endings, that is something I am not interested in. But, I have found that if you don't wear your undies when you put on the massage trousers, and you get a hard-on when they start massaging your thighs, then they will "accidentally" keep bumping their hand into your hard-on. If you don't object, or don't tuck it away between your legs, then the bumping will turn into grabbing. If you are OK with that, then they will start giggling as they do it and give you suggestive looks. If you are still going with the flow, then they will pull your pants down a little until your hard-on pops out, laugh, and, if you seem to be into it, then take it and stroke it and tell you how nice your c*ck is. If you are liking it, then they will ask if you want "special" massage.
I finally, in a weak moment, gave in when I was in Hua Hin this year. I was curious, in an odd mood, and awfully horny, since I had taken a few days off from the girls after a break-up with the girl I went with there for a week. It was 1:00 AM, and we were the only ones left in the place except for the mamasan at the counter downstairs. What made it even stranger is that the woman was very old, and not at all attractive. She went and got some sort of special oil and came back. I could hear her joking about it with the lady downstairs when she got the oil. She came back, stripped to the waist and started in on my johnson. I was somewhat amazed to see that this old lady had a very firm, tight body, and one of the best racks I have ever seen a Thai woman possess. Big, firm, great shape, and nice big nipples. She leaned over and fed them to me as she did the job down below. At one point, she was riding on my c*ck, rubbing her crotch against it(but still with her pants on), and I took hold of her hips, and then her ass. Very firm.
Then she started doing things with my balls, nutsack, and very carefully massaging the little ducts that run through that area. I had heard about this kind of a massage from a friend once, but had never imagined it could feel so good. She went at it for about 15 minutes. A couple times I almost came and she stopped me by pressing on the right spot. When I finally did come, it was one of the most explosive orgasms I have ever experienced. I was totally f*cking drained.
Then she carefully washed and cleaned my equipment, and went back to giving me a regular massage. She was also a very outstanding masseuse, BTW. One of the best.
Afterwards, when I thought of all the half-ass blowjobs I have gotten from hopelessly inept BGs who couldn't make me come if their lives depended on it, I thought, "this old lady should open up a college(or perhaps it should be a "technical institute") for BGs so that they could learn how to properly handle a man's tool. I suspect that this sort of skill was not so uncommon years ago, when this lady learned her trade. But if my experience with BGs is any indicator(and I've probably been with 100 of them), then the skill she possessed is fast becoming a lost art.
Some NGO concerned with preserving native crafts and arts should give this lady a grant to start a proper school for BGs. The world would be such a better place for it!!! And all the anti-war activists should chip in a contribution, as well, so that there will be more love, less war. If men were truly satisfied by their women, then what would be the point of fighting, after all! Sabbai!!