Corny (or otherwise) Xmas jokes

[LIBERAL MUZZIE]

Elf warning ....... these jokes may make you laugh.

Q. What king is the children's favorite at Christmas time?
A. A stocking!

Santa goes up and down so many chimneys that he's thinking of getting a yearly flue shot?

Christmas Pizza Joke
Good King Wenceslas phoned     Domino's for a pizza.
The salesgirl asked him:- 'Do you want your usual?     Deep pan, crisp and even?'

Anyone else like to share some giggles they know ......................

 

[hootlytox]

What does Santa call reindeer that don't work?
Dinner.

What do you call the fear of getting stuck in a chimney?
Santaclaustrophobia


Ho Ho ho!

 

[Lie Ryan]

How many reindeer does Santa have? The answer is two (Rudolph and Olive).

Sue

 

[Julius]

Why do reindeer wear fur coats?
Because they would look silly in plastic macs

Mother bought a huge turkey for Christmas dinner.
'That must have cost a fortune!' I said .
'Actually I got it for a poultry amount,' she said.

 

[MiSs. H. aKtHeR]

Why was Santa's little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem.

"I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included." ~ Bernard Manning.

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin. ~ Jay Leno