Darwin Awards...

[IaPdn]

>>>>1. When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim
>>>>during a hold-up in Long Beach , California , would-be robber James
>>>>Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the
>>>>barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a
>>>>meat-cutting machine and, after a little shopping around, submitted a
>>>>claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent
>>>>out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine
>>>>and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car
>>>>during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a
>>>>woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus
>>>>driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be
>>>>transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit
>>>>his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered
>>>>everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers
>>>>to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very
>>>>excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't
>>>>discovered for 3 days.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious
>>>>head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he
>>>>received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying
>>>>to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was
>>>>hit.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the
>>>>counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer,
>>>>the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which
>>>>the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and
>>>>fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he
>>>>got from the drawer... $15. [If someone points a gun at you and gives
>>>>you money, is a crime committed?]
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided
>>>>that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window,
>>>>grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it
>>>>over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the
>>>>would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store
>>>>window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man
>>>>grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the
>>>>woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher.
>>>>Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in
>>>>the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of
>>>>the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he
>>>>replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse
>>>>from."
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a
>>>>Burger King in Ypsilanti Michigan , at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and
>>>>demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't
>>>>open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered
>>>>onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The
>>>>man, frustrated, walked away. [*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home
>>>>parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for.
>>>>Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to
>>>>a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man
>>>>admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into
>>>>the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle
>>>>declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever
>>>>had.>