Holistic massage frustration

[omrama12]

Hello everyone

I have been lurking for many months since I began my ITEC holistic massage course in October and I have found that everyone is so supportive and full of valuable information.

It is now my turn to ask for some advice.

My exam is next month, both the practical and written, and I am in a state of panic. I just practiced on my partner and strokes that I was previously really confident with are now shaky and crap. The milking strokes of the neck mainly. I just can't seem to get it right and I get really frustrated which leads to me being more crap. he is very aware that I am not confident and this adds to my " why am I doing this, I'm crap" pile.

It's really hard to be positive for me and it's difficult to get out of the negative spiral that can occur after something goes a little wrong. It doesn't help that he is not supportive, he is supportive in a way but not supportive enough for me to feel I can do this.

I'm not sure what I'm trying to ask of you guys, I guess I'm one of those sad people who need to be told they are good at something before they can be good at something.

 

[Nila]

hello pea, we were all the same when we first learned its just practice, practice. I used to visualise my moves & maybe using a different model as he's clearly not appreciative , get one of your girlies round.
wishing you the best b4 long you'll be massaging like the best of 'em
Mary x

 

[Subhas]

Hello
It is now a good few years since I did my exams, but one of the things I did was to practice on friends who were also therapists and then ask for honest feedback and advice about the treatment / technique etc - it really helped me and now I do the same for others - ask around where you live or amongst your friends.
I'm sure you will be fine
Jx

 

[Cuddles]

Hi pea, I've only done Indian Head massage, but I found when I was practising it helped to use a specific piece of music so that the massage became a 'routine to music' and I got into the flow and I found the massage movements became more fluid. It also helped me to remember the routine as I became familiar with what move I should be doing at certain places in the music. Good luck with your exam!

 

[vogonsrock]

Hiya Pea
I think we all have a crisis in confidence at some time - I've been doing this for 15 years and once in a while I still have a wobble. I remember when I struggled with a couple of moves I practised on the arm of the chair, on my leg, on anything....it just helped me feel more confident when I then worked on people. I used to be the one stopped at traffic lights hacking and cupping or trying to do thumb walking on the steering wheel - did I get some funny looks. Good luck!

 

[WawDannawardy]

That just gave me such a good laugh! Thanks for starting my day like that! SO TRUE!!! My steering wheel has had many a reflexology treatment!!!
Love Melanie x

 

[Emad Thee]

See if any of your friends do EFT - an hour's session could be invaluable for your confidence!

 

[jissell]

Try working with your eyes closed so you can truly feel what you're doing and not using your intellect via your sight. You'll be surprised at the results!!.

 

[NoExpense]

I've been massaging for many years now, and I still freeze if I stop and think about it too much If you don't have any friends nearby to practise on ask a neighbour, everyone wants free practise treatments, its getting paying clients that can be the problem!

I would echo Sue about trying some moves with your eyes closed (though not at the traffic lights!), my reflexology teacher used to turn the lights off so we could feel our treatments not see them and its surprising the difference it makes, I often do my evening treatments in semi darkness now Tracey

 

[medecinesklm]

hey pea, you need to 1. practice practice practice, until the moves the feel so natural, touch, right pressure, see the pictures, moves in your mind, mix it up with different people, for more practice.good luck.

 

[MissBieber]

Pea. I'm sure I wrote a similar post to yours some time ago (before I qualified). I massaged loads of friends/family & clients at college and they were all very pleased and gave me good feedback.

It's just a confidence thing I think and everyone will tell you to relax (including me!) but I know it isn't that easy. I recently had to give a full body massage to a local salon owner who is the best around here and has a great reputation. This was in order to get some work from her in the future.

I was quite nervous for a few days, nervous driving there and then I thought "what's the worst thing that can happen?" It was that she felt I needed more experience and she said the massage was just OK.

With that thought in my head, I just chilled out and got on with it and she said it was very good and she'll be putting some work my way.

You'll be fine .... honestly!

 

[Diaxinvonvibe]

Hi Pea - hope you are feeling better about things after some encouraging words of advice on your thread.

My contribution would be to suggest you stop thinking and worrying about the technicalities - once we've learned them, they are in our minds and usually what we are worried about is recalling them when doing an exam or giving a treatment. Recall is much better in a relaxed state.

The other thing I used to tell my students when I taught massage was to remember how it felt to receive a good massage and then, when giving someone else a massage, simply intend to give them that good feeling and the stokes will flow. Intention will transform a mediocre massage into something transformational.

 

[wnydyuwk]

Loads of brilliant advice and thinking about a good massage you've had is a great way to give a good massage. I really think, as a therapist, you need regular treatments so you get an idea of what you think is good and and not so good. Is there someone on your course you can swap treatments with as then you can both talk through the bits you're not sure of?


Footsie01 - I especially think keeping your eyes open at traffic lights is a good idea!

 

[cybear869]

PS - massage like you really care i.e. about what you are doing and that the recipient is feeling nurtured and relaxed. There's nothing worse than receiving a massage from someone who is just performing a set of massage strokes with no thought for the person receiving the treatment

 

[GunieaPigs4LYF]

Thank you so much for all this brilliant advice, I have massaged a few people since my original post and I have been visualising the strokes at work, I like the idea of intent too, it's amazing what you can do if you just 'think' positively! I massaged a friend who is an anmo? Massage therapist, he does Kung Fu and has a lot of energy and he gave me some good advice. He also said I have to stop saying sorry :-/ I used to be terrible for apologising to much, though I'm not as bad a s I used to be!

So I think I'm feeling good about it, I have been studying a lot too and getting to grips with the endocrine system.

OH I also discovered that the wee hole in my massage table was hindering my strokes at it was slightly poking up (I will get a better table at some point) so it was good to notice that and realise that it wasn't me that got crap!

I do like the idea of getting regular massages ... You know... Just so I can remember what it's like to get a good massage :-D (hee hee) x

You are all so lovely and full of advice, I'm sorry I didn't reply sooner! X