HOW to HANDLE an urgent FART during a Massage Session

[Deleted member 79939]

Hi,

I don't want to sound insensitive or eccentric or disgusting.

But let's say - in the middle of a sensual massage I really got to fart.

a. should I let the FART rip and say "excuse me"
b. should i hold the FART in... really, is that healthy?
c. but when she massages my mangoes, the fart might take wind, I don't want that

So, what is the best polite way
to handle this FARTING situation in a massage parlor
without messing up the moment.

I really don't want the lady massage to think I am not a gentleman.

But fart(s) happens.
Some considers it exotic in Brazil.
But in Canada- it's a no no.

Thanks.

 

[Deleted member 79939]

Wow. Sounds like marriage.
I recall Brad Pitt said, when you are in bed with a lady.
A fart is a fart.
No big deal.
But will the massage lady kick me out next time?

 

[Bdontkillmyvibe]

I read a story once on the blue or red board of a guy who went to Thailand. He went and ate at some fancy restaurant but the food gave him food poisoning.

That night he went to a massage parlor and while he was getting massaged he had to let one rip. He thought it would be silent but it was a wet loud rambunctious one. The lady actually giggled and said something like "now you're really relaxed" or "don't worry baby, it's good to relax"

Unfortunately for the guy, that wasn't the only thing to come out of his ass, and he had explosive diarrhea a few minutes later. The lady was traumatized and ran out of the room and he ended up footing the $200+ cleaning bill lol