how to stop contact with someone ur chatting to online once they show you...

[fatima]

...their pic and they're not your type? I have been chatting to a guy for a few weeks. I'm not normally one to do online dating but I figured it would do no harm. So I got chatting to this guy and I didnt ask for a pic as personality is more important to me and unless the person was hideously ugly, looks wouldnt put me off someone. So finally we decided to exchange pics. When I saw his pics I almost died. Unfortuantly he was extremely plain for my tastes. He just isnt my type and no matter how good his personality, I just cannot get over that. Also as he is interested in dating I dont think friendship would ever work and tbh I'm not looking to make friends at the moment. So I've been replying to his messages as I think to stop contact straight away makes it obvious that you didn't find them physically attractive and that's just cruel. But I REALLY do not want to stay in contact.How do I nicely stop contact? I don't want to just stop replying with no explanation?
Saurica he WAS hideously ugly. I just didnt want to say that as that's mean. 'Rather plain' was my way of saying the same thing. I think that's obvious to anyone with an average IQ

 

[Like a dream]

That's unfortunate, I am sure someone out there will appreciate him for who he is both personality-wise and physical appearance. If you want to end all communication maybe state that you might not be interested in dating at this point in time due to other personal affairs in your life. Or in a very gentle message tell him that you enjoyed talking to him but you don't think you two are compatible and wish him well in his future dating endeavors.

 

[Saurica ?]

I find it kind of ironic... earlier you said "unless the person was hideously ugly, looks wouldn't put me off someone." Then, you realize he's kinda plain, but not hideously ugly... and now you don't like his looks...?

Putting that aside, it's nice of you to put his feelings into consideration and not simply ignore him.
I find just staying away from the computer helps. Try hanging out with friends / family more, and go out and do things that don't need a computer. It's better for your health and it helps you forget about him. Or simply stay offline... you guys can't talk if you're not there to talk to him, right?

I used to have tons of online friends who I talked to every day. I ended up not talking to them anymore, not because I didn't like them, but because I found stuff to do irl and was barely online to talk to them at all.

 

[Get In Line]

You're right. If he's interested in dating, he'll never settle for friendship. If he says he would...he's lying, and I don't mean any disrepect to him by that, it's simply the truth. I don't think it would be wrong of you to back out of this, and still allow him his dignity by telling him you've met someone else that you're interested in and you don't think it would be right to continue contact. It's possible that he'll put 2 and 2 together and realize that you coincidentally found someone else shortly after you saw his picture...but I think it would be kinder of you to let him wonder if that's the real reason, than for him to KNOW it is. It wouldn't do either of you any good to be honest in this case...I'm just saying.

 

[mymy]

umm just tell him that he's just not your type.

 

[Miel]

The best thing to do is stop replying right away. Looks do matter to you, obviously, and enough that there is no way this is going to work.

Why don't you say something like, "please forgive me being so abrupt - but I don't want to communicate any longer as I am interested in pursuing someone else." Adding the part about pursuing someone else (which is true - you do want to pursue someone else even if you don't know exactly who right now) will spare him time and some anguish in trying to figure out what went wrong and he will be able to pick himself up and move on quicker.