Happy Birthday and Bucky is right.
Self pity is a comforting behavior that fills a need for obsessive thinking. The key to beating it is to recognize it when it creeps into your thoughts and eliminate it immediately. Because feeling sorry for oneself becomes a pattern over time, you need to retrain your brain not to think so negatively.
I know its easy to say as I am not in your shoe. But I was at one point, positive thinking dude is the key.