Important Flu warning...new strain
Important public health warning:
I had a few friends round last night, and between us we managed to consume a rather large amount of grape-based alcohol. I awoke this morning not feeling well, with what could be described as flu-like symptoms; headache, nausea, chills, dry mouth etc.
From the results of some initial testing, I have unfortunately tested positive for what experts are now calling Wine Flu. This debilitating condition is very seriousโand it appears this is not an isolated case. Reports are flooding in from all around the area of others diagnosed with Wine Flu.
To anyone that starts to exhibit the aforementioned tell-tale signs, experts are recommending a cup of tea and a bit of a lie down.
However, should your condition worsen, you should immediately hire a DVD and take some Nurofen [Nurofen seems to be the only drug available that has been proven to help combat this unusual type of flu].
Wine Flu does not need to be life threatening, and if treated early can be eradicated within a 24-48 hour period. If not, then further application of the original grape-based liquid in similar quantities to the original dose has been shown to do the trick.
Good luck
SWINE FLU UPDATE
The doctor asked me how long I'd had the symptoms of Swine Flu. I said it must have been about a Weeeeeeeeeeeeeek!
The only known cure for Swine Flu in humans has been found to be the liberal application of โoinkmentโ.
IF YOU GET AN EMAIL ABOUT SWINE FLU DELETE IT AS ITS ONLY SPAM.
This little piggy went to market,
This little piggy stayed at home,
This little piggy had roast beef,
This little piggy had none,
And this little piggy had influenza A virus subtype hemagglutinin protein 1 neuraminidase protein 1.
Swine flu however, is not a problem for the pigs because they're all going to be cured anyway!
News Flash .... This just in. The world's religious leaders have issued a joint declaration that the Swine Flu pandemic is the start of the aporkalypse.
Swine flu has now mixed with bird flu. Scientists say they will find a cure when pigs fly.
I just heard on the news that, "Swine Flu could potentially be a threat to every single person in the world". Well it's a good thing I'm married then, isn't it?
This is not a time for panic. It is no pig deal. It is a mild hamdemic, don't believe the spam you're getting.
Important public health warning:
I had a few friends round last night, and between us we managed to consume a rather large amount of grape-based alcohol. I awoke this morning not feeling well, with what could be described as flu-like symptoms; headache, nausea, chills, dry mouth etc.
From the results of some initial testing, I have unfortunately tested positive for what experts are now calling Wine Flu. This debilitating condition is very seriousโand it appears this is not an isolated case. Reports are flooding in from all around the area of others diagnosed with Wine Flu.
To anyone that starts to exhibit the aforementioned tell-tale signs, experts are recommending a cup of tea and a bit of a lie down.
However, should your condition worsen, you should immediately hire a DVD and take some Nurofen [Nurofen seems to be the only drug available that has been proven to help combat this unusual type of flu].
Wine Flu does not need to be life threatening, and if treated early can be eradicated within a 24-48 hour period. If not, then further application of the original grape-based liquid in similar quantities to the original dose has been shown to do the trick.
Good luck
SWINE FLU UPDATE
The doctor asked me how long I'd had the symptoms of Swine Flu. I said it must have been about a Weeeeeeeeeeeeeek!
The only known cure for Swine Flu in humans has been found to be the liberal application of โoinkmentโ.
IF YOU GET AN EMAIL ABOUT SWINE FLU DELETE IT AS ITS ONLY SPAM.
This little piggy went to market,
This little piggy stayed at home,
This little piggy had roast beef,
This little piggy had none,
And this little piggy had influenza A virus subtype hemagglutinin protein 1 neuraminidase protein 1.
Swine flu however, is not a problem for the pigs because they're all going to be cured anyway!
News Flash .... This just in. The world's religious leaders have issued a joint declaration that the Swine Flu pandemic is the start of the aporkalypse.
Swine flu has now mixed with bird flu. Scientists say they will find a cure when pigs fly.
I just heard on the news that, "Swine Flu could potentially be a threat to every single person in the world". Well it's a good thing I'm married then, isn't it?
This is not a time for panic. It is no pig deal. It is a mild hamdemic, don't believe the spam you're getting.
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