Is it better to break it off with someone over the phone, or over chat?

[Mandy♥]

I don't want to do it in person, because I don't want us to both make an effort to meet up, just for me to let him down. So it's either by phone or chat.

I know that voice and tone are important so that he can hear and understand how I feel, plus there's less chance of miscommunication voice-to-voice. I was also thinking, I should do it on the phone, because he deserves that much, not just words on a screen.

But then, I was told that it would probably be better to do it by chat, because it would be less hurtful not hearing my voice. Also, it would allow him time to look back at the conversation and process it, rather than just hearing it all at once. Also, if I'm not hearing his voice, then it would be easier for me to say what I need to say and not back down, (my sympathies might play up hearing his voice, and I might unintentially imply that we still have a chance). So it sounds like a better choice that way, but at the same time, I'd still be breaking up with him over a screen, and I still feel he deserves more effort than that.

I know either way will be hurtful, but which one seems like it would be more appropriate? How would you prefer to be let down?

Just some details: We've been together two months, and he really doesn't know this is coming. I've tried to drop hints leading up to a break up to make it a little easier, but they haven't worked. I'd like to remain friends with him and I want to do this as kind as possible. Thank you.
It's takes a lot of effort for both of us to meet up in the first place, and I just don't want him to think we're going to have a nice time, and then I let him down. If I could, I would, but I don't think that's the best option. Plus we haven't seen each other in person for the past two weeks. I don't want to finally see him and then break up with him.
Well thank you all for attacking my character. That's lovely, I appreciate it!

 

[nonmisogynisticAL]

it kind of depends on how you hooked up........
was it over text, on phone, or in person?

you at least owe him that!

your choice ultimately!

 

[Miss Molly ♥]

Do it over the phone if you must but that seems kinda lame, but i think you should talk to him in person, suggest a walk or something. At least when you're on your walk you'll be able to decide if it's really what you want.

 

[Yep]

Definitely over the phone.

 

[Chilanga]

Unless you are in middle school neither option is okay.

 

[madcowbutcher]

in person is the only way to do it at a mature level, but if you really don't want to put THAT much effort into it do it by phone.

 

[orioninkc]

Ummm...you've been together two months? Unless you are in high school, it's not a "break up" It's just not seeing each other any more.

Phone or chat is fine, phone is better than chat No need to do it in person. You'd just be asking for trouble It's been two months. He'll get over it.

 

[Lol]

Either option is offensive, if you are going to let him down, at least have the decency to do it in person. Doing it any other way is completely cowardly.

 

[Jenny K]

breaking up with someone on the phone is tacky and immature! doing it by chat is cowardly and pathetic. don't make such a big deal about it, he probably doesn't like you as much as you think he does anyway! do it in person, if you can't handle ending a relationship, you can't handle being in a relationship

 

[Nick]

Ouch! Even reading about being broke up with stirs such pain!!!! Well, the truth is, there's no good way to get bad news. Two months really isn't that long of a relationship so I don't think it's a mandatory "in person" breakup, but still in person is the best way. Next best is the phone because it's more personal. *runs off to have a good man-cry*

 

[Kent]

Do it by email... it's much funnier!

 

[Rupert]

Do it in person. If you care at all about this person then you will make the effort to meet them and break it to them in person.
I find it sad that you are even considering the other two options.
I don't know you, and am already forming opinions about your character, and they aren't good. Seriously, what kind of person would break up over the phone or in an email when they could do it in person?

 

[Joy]

Women up and do it in person. Grow some ovaries.

 

[FiftySixer]

The only decent way to break up with ANYONE is IN PERSON. Doing it over the phone of chat is just taking the cowards way out.