eforum.xxx user "LESATINROUGE" PMed me offering me a peace offering of a discount on the cover charge if I would come in and give an "honest review" of their establishment.
I replied back in the affirmative but, when I didn't get a response right away I decided to give it a try as an "anonymous" customer so as not to get any special treatment and get "usual services" on which to base my "honest review". In other words, for the sake of being unbiased, I passed on the discount.
The Booking
When I called at 18:40 inquiring who was available at 19:00, I was told that all three girls working that night (Tara, Lila and Cynthia) were available. The voice on the phone was just so bubbly, perky and full of life that I couldn't help but crack a smile as the arrangements were made. In the end I settled on Tara as she was the one of the three that had the longest history of postings on Craigslist for this place so I assumed she was the more experienced.
And off I went.
The Premises
First off, there is zero signage on the downstairs door other than the suite number. Be sure to get the suite number when making your appointment, otherwise you could spend a lot of time just wandering around.
The premises are clean and well-kept, but nothing out of the ordinary or above average. I would say it's definately "middle of the pack" for my limited experience with Montreal Massage Parlours.
Because the showers in the rooms were obviouisly added in after-the-fact and they are in the basement with a concrete floor under the tile, the showers are raised off the floor to make way for the plumbing. This is fine except that without a step in front of the shower, you've got to be pretty spry and/or nimble to get into and out of the shower easily.
The lights must be tied into motion sensors because they kept dimming/brightening based on how much movement was in the room. They turned off on their own when I was in the shower and they turned themselves back on when I was getting dressed afterwards. I know it wasn't something that the masseuse was doing because when she came in after my shower, she asked me if *I* had turned off the lights and she was in the shower herself when they came back on afterwards.
At least I hope the lights were tied into motion sensors or some sort of time...otherwise this place has some serious electrical issues.
Unfortunately, I was unlucky enough to be in the room that shares a wall with the Tap Dancing School next door. All throughout, the session, I got to hear the rumble-rumble-rumble of dozens of tap-dancing feet in the next room.
My only other comment about the premises is the fact that the massage table was pushed up against the wall, instead of being centered in the room. This meant that the masseuse only had access from one side and, because of this, one side would got favored in the massage more than the other (which, indeed, ended up happening).
Tara
Upon entry, I was greeted by Tara who was waiting for me. It became evident within the first 30 seconds that her voice had been the one on the other end of the phone when I called to book.
In person, she was not only just as full of life and effervescence as she was on the phone, but she was also just about the cutest thing I had ever seen. I had to resist the urge to just scoop her up and cuddle her like a little kitten.
I think she's a naturally social and outgoing person and when she gave me the price for an hour and explained that "my options range from $40 to $120" it was the only thing that sounded impersonal and rehearsed.
Unfortunately, this was also the first strike against the place as any of the truly classy places I've been to, the girls never mention money at all. Not at the end (they leave it up to the Customer to tip what they feel is appropriate) and definately not up front before I'd even taken off my coat.
Wanting to properly evaluate the place, I immediately opted for the $120 option. The details of that pricing were never discussed. My plan: take the highest option and see what happens.
Based on typical pricing structure, for that price I'd expect a Nude Thai and a "complete servicing".
Based on previoiusly reviewed pricing for this establishment, for that price I'd expect a Nude Thai and some "oral tradition".
And, of course it is the pricing structure that has caused the most controversy in this thread.
The Massage "Experience"
I wish I could give more positive feedback on the massage experience itself.
I really like this girl on a personal level and I would really, really, really like to tell you the massage was great. Or even good. Unfortunately, either of these classifications would be incorrect.
I think the best way to describe Tara's skill level at massage (either sensual, erotic, therapeutic or otherwise) as "inexperienced".
Her conventional massage on my back was uninspired, far too weak and went on far too long. Or maybe it just seemed too long.
When she disrobed for the "nude Thai" portion on my back, she elected to strip down to topless only. This left no illusions as to the type of mileage I was going to be getting out of this experience. With the bottoms staying on, this $120 experience would be the equivalent of a $100 experience anywhere else I have been so far.
When it came time for the flip, certain parts of my anatomy just weren't responding at all. Despite a little blue pill I took an hour and a half previous. She made one perfunctory body slide which actually started to get a reaction but she stopped after one slide and decided to focus on the aforementioned part of my anatomy.
To all MPs reading this: MEN HAVE MORE THAN ONE EROGENOUS ZONE!
The more MPs that learn this fact, the happier we will all be (and our -- or at least my -- tipping will increase accordingly).
In order to get any reaction at all, I had to start clenching and unclenching certain muscles. On the plus side, this helps get things moving but, on the down side, this also can lead to a premature ending...which of course it did in this case.
With the main event over so soon, and time still left on the clock, she asked me if I wanted more of a massage. I debated the merits of suffering through another 15 minutes of lacklustre back rubs vs. getting "my money's worth". In the end, I opted to go back to the massage and asked her specifically to focus on my neck and shoulders.
At first I was regretting the decision until she asked if she was doing it "too hard". I had to surpress a laugh at this and we started talking about massage styles, techniques, and different Montreal MPs. She really started to get into in and was doing a proper good job on my neck and shoulders.
She seemed very receptive to hearing about other MP's styles and things she could to to improve her technique. In fact she was not only receptive but also seemed to be extremely happy to be hearing about other MP's techniques. Surprisingly, this "after-thought" massage turned out to be the best part of the whole experience. Yes, even better than the lacklustre release.
In summary
The place is nothing special. The strength of the place relies on the beauty of their hostesses, which is undeniable.
Tara is a ray of sunshine. A tonic to the soul. She's the kind of lady that you want to take out to a fine meal or sit snuggled up with in front of a warm fire.
However, as a masseuse, she's completely inexperienced and needs some pointers from some ladies who really know what they are doing. Either as a therapeutic masseuse or as a teaser of men.
As for the ongoing discussion regarding pricing...
Obviously LESATINROUGE and myself aren't in complete agreement on pricing as the pricing of this establishment is above the norm with very little to warrant the additional pricing. The girls are lovely, yes, and if Tara is any indication they are extremely pleasant to converse with and as sweet as cotton candy. But, just like cotton candy, you really can't get a meal out of the experience.
Other places charge less and provide comparable ladies and greater range of services. I'm not suggesting that they increase their services but I think their pricing needs to be readjusted to the services that they do feel comfortable providing.
Would I repeat?
The Salon? Not likely.
There are too many other quality places offering more servcie for the same amount or charging less for the same services. Plus, Tara tells me the place will be moving downtown at some point in the near future, which makes it less convenient for me.
Tara?
If she could get some proper pointers and either how to give a proper therapeutic massage or at least how to excite/entice a man, then I'd be there in a shot. Her personality and charm are enough to make you want to spend the time just talking to her. But at $175 an hour ($55 to the house and $120 to Tara) that makes for a pretty expensive conversation. Even at her lowest "option" of $40, that'd be a $90 conversation.
I'm afraid there are just too many other ladies out there who are far more experienced in their profession that I'll be visiting instead.