Old Age

[Sando]

I hope this doesn't offend anyone, but I couldn't resist passing this on, about ladies who've reached a certain time of life....and thankfully I ain't there yet!


I used to have Saturday Night Fever... Now I just have Saturday Night hot flushes.

Ever get the feeling your stuff strutted off without you?

Any woman can have the body of a 21-year-old... as long as she buys him a few drinks first.

My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

I've still got it, but nobody wants to see it.

I'm getting into swing dancing. Not on purpose some parts of my
body are just prone to swinging.

It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker.

I think I've reached my sexpiration date.

People our age can still enjoy an active, passionate sex life!
Provided we get cable or that dish thing.

The good news is that even as we get older, guys still look at our boobs. The bad news is they have to squat down first.

These days about half the stuff in my shopping trolley says, "For fast relief."

I've tried to find a suitable exercise video for people my age..
But they haven't made one called "Buns of Putty."

Don't think of it as getting hot flushes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches.

Don't let ageing get you down...It's too hard to get back UP!