Pain freaks.

[Odd Boy]

Another massage therapist I met had coined this term for certain clients who like deep, to the point of painful massages... "pain freaks".

I have never in my career ever gotten a complaint about not going deep enough. Most clients who try to challenge me, convinced I won't be able to provide them with deep enough massage, usually eat their words. However, I seem to have built up a large clientele of these "pain freaks".

I'm finding I can't handle this type of work anymore. I don't want to do deep work and I'm not sure that I even believe in it anymore, if that makes sense? The problem is, I still have some of these clients. I don't know how to break it to them that I'm just not going to do that type of therapy anymore.

I have one client for example, that has always tried to tell me what to do during the session. He wants me to work only on his upper traps and rhomboids for the entire hour! Then he tells me he didn't feel things start to "loosen up" until the last ten minutes of the session. When I explain (over and over again) that he will feel more relief the following day and even more the day after that, he still insists on booking another appointment within the week, convinced he will need it. He always ends up cancelling that appointment because, ta-da, like magic, he feels better a day or two after his massage! I wonder why? t017 I even called this guy once and explained that I had a thumb injury and couldn't do deep work, did he still want to keep his appointment? He did, and I used gentler techniques. He then re-booked for a week later insisting that he still needed a deep tissue masssage. :undecided:

The problem I'm encountering is that these clients feel they really need deep, deep work. I don't think they are in touch with their bodies enough to appreciate the more gentle methods. I'm personally learning to appreciate MFR and finding the work quite profound! My clients however, don't have that same appreciation and insist on having the same old, same old sessions. I feel like I have to start all over marketing to a new type of client? What do you think I should do?

 

[Blair]

Pain freaks.

MFR is my passion. When I am doing chair massage and someone says they want me to go really deep, I ask them if they would like me to go deep. . .OR get rid of the knots. They have never heard of this but as soon as they feel a knot or knots melting, they are convinced!

I am not sure that you will ever be able to change their mind. Can you concentrate on new clients? Or offer these older clients a package reduced rate to try MFR sessions and see how the results are.

Just a thought or two.

 

[Darth Mike 420]

Pain freaks.

It sounds like if you can't re-educate your clients or convince them to try something new, well.. you just might have to help them find a new therapist. I really like MarionFM's comment about deep vs. getting rid of knots as well as offering them a discounted MFR session to encourage them to at least try it.

 

[Fluffy]

Pain freaks.

Another massage therapist I met had coined this term for certain clients who like deep, to the point of painful massages... "pain freaks".

I have never in my career ever gotten a complaint about not going deep enough. Most clients who try to challenge me, convinced I won't be able to provide them with deep enough massage, usually eat their words. However, I seem to have built up a large clientele of these "pain freaks".

I'm finding I can't handle this type of work anymore. I don't want to do deep work and I'm not sure that I even believe in it anymore, if that makes sense? The problem is, I still have some of these clients. I don't know how to break it to them that I'm just not going to do that type of therapy anymore.

I have one client for example, that has always tried to tell me what to do during the session. He wants me to work only on his upper traps and rhomboids for the entire hour! Then he tells me he didn't feel things start to "loosen up" until the last ten minutes of the session. When I explain (over and over again) that he will feel more relief the following day and even more the day after that, he still insists on booking another appointment within the week, convinced he will need it. He always ends up cancelling that appointment because, ta-da, like magic, he feels better a day or two after his massage! I wonder why? t017 I even called this guy once and explained that I had a thumb injury and couldn't do deep work, did he still want to keep his appointment? He did, and I used gentler techniques. He then re-booked for a week later insisting that he still needed a deep tissue masssage. :undecided:

The problem I'm encountering is that these clients feel they really need deep, deep work. I don't think they are in touch with their bodies enough to appreciate the more gentle methods. I'm personally learning to appreciate MFR and finding the work quite profound! My clients however, don't have that same appreciation and insist on having the same old, same old sessions. I feel like I have to start all over marketing to a new type of client? What do you think I should do?

Yes, I was in exactly this situation four years ago. I was very, very popular for doing excrutiatingly painful work. About 1/2 of my clients were "pain freaks" and the other half were just used to the idea of painfully deep massage, though I would gladly lighten up if asked. However, I was learning more about massage and how the body works, and realized that the approach my clients were used to was NOT what I wished to continue doing long-term. I gradually moved away from the painful work, incorporating different techniques, changing how much pressure I used, working at different tempos, etc. Some clients weren't very happy, but I attempted to educate all of them. Some moved on to find other MTs, and others decided they liked my new approach anyway.

Since then, I have been relatively fearless about bringing new methods/concepts into my practice. Some require a bit more up-front explanation and client consent, while others fit into my existing work seamlessly. There will always be some clients who prefer the "old Jason" (whatever that was) and decide to try other MTs. But there will always be some who like the "new Jason" and the way they feel after a session with me. In general, I have found that every time my practice evolved in a new direction that I truly preferred, my client list grew.

I also didn't feel it was my responsibility to help the old clients find someone else who did the work that I no longer cared to do. If they asked, I could suggest a few names, but I didn't know if any of those MTs were really anything like me. My efforts at client education seemed a better long-term course of action because they might actually learn something useful and perhaps be more understanding of any other MTs they might try.

 

[sahtlover]

Pain freaks.

I have one client for example, that has always tried to tell me what to do during the session. He wants me to work only on his upper traps and rhomboids for the entire hour! Then he tells me he didn't feel things start to "loosen up" until the last ten minutes of the session. When I explain (over and over again) that he will feel more relief the following day and even more the day after that, he still insists on booking another appointment within the week, convinced he will need it. He always ends up cancelling that appointment because, ta-da, like magic, he feels better a day or two after his massage! I wonder why? t017 I even called this guy once and explained that I had a thumb injury and couldn't do deep work, did he still want to keep his appointment? He did, and I used gentler techniques. He then re-booked for a week later insisting that he still needed a deep tissue masssage. :undecided:

This kind of client needs a very direct approach. The next time he comes in, tell him you have learned and practiced some more effective methods than what he typically requests. Tell him these new methods are less painful and much more efficient, and that you plan to make them a regular part of your sessions with him. If he balks (at all), remind him that doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results, is one of the definitions of insanity... and then tell him you aren't crazy and you'd like him to not be crazy too. :altwink: Injecting a little humor should help, but basically the session is yours to control. If he still wants you to bang away on his upper back, tell him that he's asking you to waste time when it's his pecs and anterior shoulder girdle that need the work... and that you won't do it anymore. You know that approach won't work and ethically you need to exercise your best professional judgement during treatment. If he doesn't want you to perform your duties in a professional, ethical, and knowledgeable way, he will need to find another MT willing to take his money for ineffective work. :twisted:

My guess is he'll either give you a chance (or two) and see how it works, or that will be the last time you see him. Win-win! :grin:

 

[BrownGuy]

Pain freaks.

I just want to say that I totally feel you! I am SO at that point right now and this year am going to begin taking more MFR classes. We did it in school and it was always amazing work but I got sucked into the deep tissue/pain freak thing and 10 years later am tired of it.

All the advice given is great. I thank you all!

 

[Sierra]

Pain freaks.

For those with "pain freaks" for clients, have you found that many of them are unable to tolerate the pressure by consciously or unconsciously tightening up? Or are most of them able to handle the deep pressure and pain? I've had MANY clients request deep pressure and repeatedly request that I go deeper because "no pain, no gain!" - but at the same time they're holding their breath and tensing up. I once had a client who wanted the deepest massage I could give - he wanted it to hurt. When I got to my medium-deep pressure, he had already begun tensing up and holding his breath, unable to tolerate the pressure. At the very same time he said "that doesn't hurt. I barely feel that." He repeated it MANY times. Yet it was obvious that it was too deep for him. I did my very best to educate him about the threat for injury for both him and me when I try to work muscles that he's contracting. Could NOT get through to him. It's horrible of me and very unethical, but sometimes with clients like that I'd really like to give them a VERY sharp elbow to the IT band.

 

[DayiTh!nkz Bill ist Sexxi]

Pain freaks.

For those with "pain freaks" for clients, have you found that many of them are unable to tolerate the pressure by consciously or unconsciously tightening up?

My clients can actually take the pain. I've had some who tense up, but I won't apply pressure to tense muscles so I stop until they relax. My pain freaks can take all I can give. I really think that these people are just "stuck" in their healing process and don't want to let go. They don't want to peel away the layers of the onion for some reason, and they have big walls up around them. If they would start peeling away those layers, they would eventually begin to appreciate the gentler (yet ultimately much deeper) modalities. Until they get to that place, I don't think some of them will ever find true healing. I think the deep work that they think they need is just the particular seforum.xxxe of the healing process for them but for a lot of mine they are stuck there and don't want to move forward, or deeper and want to just repeat the same-old, same-old. Perhaps its fear? I don't know, but those clients are particularly draining both physically and emotionally.

 

[SMILE!]

Pain freaks.

I too am getting board with deep tissue. I am slowly changing to myofascial release and craniosacral therapy. And I am finding my clients are really enjoying having a new experiance

 

[IsotypeSwitching]

Pain freaks.

For those with "pain freaks" for clients, have you found that many of them are unable to tolerate the pressure by consciously or unconsciously tightening up? Or are most of them able to handle the deep pressure and pain? I've had MANY clients request deep pressure and repeatedly request that I go deeper because "no pain, no gain!" - but at the same time they're holding their breath and tensing up. I once had a client who wanted the deepest massage I could give - he wanted it to hurt. When I got to my medium-deep pressure, he had already begun tensing up and holding his breath, unable to tolerate the pressure. At the very same time he said "that doesn't hurt. I barely feel that." He repeated it MANY times. Yet it was obvious that it was too deep for him. I did my very best to educate him about the threat for injury for both him and me when I try to work muscles that he's contracting. Could NOT get through to him. It's horrible of me and very unethical, but sometimes with clients like that I'd really like to give them a VERY sharp elbow to the IT band.

LOL! I guess I am "horrible" too!
I am not comfortable with a client directing the session at all. When someone says to me "you can go deeper", I will usually just ignore them and continue with appropriate work. BUT if they are being particularly annoying I have been known to put a thumb or elbow directly into their muscle spasm - then say..."This muscle is in spasm. I can only go as deep as your body is able to let me in. Beyond that can cause damage to the tissues - and I am unwilling to do that to your body."
My specific work is fairly gentle, most people find that it is very effective.
If they don't like the way I work I am more than happy to suggest that they work with someone else.

 

[ybird100]

Pain freaks.

The problem I'm encountering is that these clients feel they really need deep, deep work. I don't think they are in touch with their bodies enough to appreciate the more gentle methods. I'm personally learning to appreciate MFR and finding the work quite profound! My clients however, don't have that same appreciation and insist on having the same old, same old sessions. I feel like I have to start all over marketing to a new type of client? What do you think I should do?

The nice thing about having a bag of tricks with many different skills is that you can market your work in multiple ways. If you have only been doing deep tissue for people who want to feel the pressure, you will be pleasantly surprised as your skills expand. Mixing other types of work and people into the practice will also help save your hands over the years.

Do you have a website? If so, begin to change the focus and look of the site. Tailor it to what you are wanting to bring into the practice. Want more women? Add more flowery speech, textures, pictures and possibly even the font. Want to put a positive spin on "saving your hands"? Mention that MFR will allow you to practice more years. Even though you and I know that you can practice many years no matter what the style (if you do the work correctly), at the same time, this gives you a feel to the website which is informative about a personal reason why you choose this style of work. People reading the site will resonate with a practice that is effective and lighter, without you having to go into a lot of explanation.

If you like MFR and know it, start advertising with it. And, another way to educate your clients who recieve your original style of bodywork, is by telling them you are going to be spending about half the session with your new technique (whatever you choose) along with some of the original style of work. This will give them a few opportunities to experience your new style and sessions while making the decision if they want to continue with you (many times they will) for their future sessions.

You can also set a deadline as to when you will completely introduce the new technique/s into your practice, and begin telling clients now. "By May 1, 2010 I will be completely switched over to the nnn technique/s."

Start off your new clients with the new technique/s. Make sure and find out who referred these clients, so you are aware of what they are expecting when walking through your doors. If they are a referral from an old and incompatable style of your work, be prepared to educate before the client gets on the table. What you don't want is for someone to walk in expecting one thing, put them on the table and do something else, only for them to leave dis-satisfied and not knowing why. A little education with someone like this will keep them from bad-mouthing your work, by the nature of their expectation being dashed. Have the names of a few therapists who work in the style you will be quitting on hand in case someone asks for a referral.

I think this will help make the transition easier for everyone involved, if you don't want to change immediately by stopping cold turkey.

 

[Clampinon]

Pain freaks.

I have noticed that most of the people that request the “over the top" deep pressure that I am not comfortable giving have other issues. Quite often they are the ones that have injured themselves starting an exercise routine that is too aggressive. Then they come for some "really deep work" to “fix” the injury. They play hard, diet hard and generally don't listen to their bodies. It seems to me to be a form of self punishment.

Interestingly, today I have one of these people on my schedule. The MT this person has seen in the past is no longer available. The previous MT did nothing but very deep work. So...today I will practice sticking to my boundaries and offering some education with the massage.

 

[Wolf Mike]

Pain freaks.

I think I'd like to point out with this (especially with clients who had a previous therapist who did that kind of work) is to be careful not to discount or "put down" other therapists who do that. While you might not agree with the work they do, they are a fellow MT still. Carefully chosen words like "I have found that such and such modality is actually more effective even though it feels lighter" and others that have been mentioned in previous posts are less condescending to both the client and your colleagues than something such as "Going too deep will only hurt you", "I don't believe in causing people pain" and the like.

 

[Walter XI JPA]

Pain freaks.

I think I'd like to point out with this (especially with clients who had a previous therapist who did that kind of work) is to be careful not to discount or "put down" other therapists who do that. While you might not agree with the work they do, they are a fellow MT still. Carefully chosen words like "I have found that such and such modality is actually more effective even though it feels lighter" and others that have been mentioned in previous posts are less condescending to both the client and your colleagues than something such as "Going too deep will only hurt you", "I don't believe in causing people pain" and the like.

I don't see it that way at all - but of course it probably depends on the tone of voice.
As has been said many times in the past, it is about educating the client.
I am straight forward about the work that *I* do - which in no way disparages the work that other therapists do (however it HAS been my experience that the search and destroy no-holds-barred type of therapists are usually less experienced and less educated themselves).
If the client prefers that type of work, it is always their decision to seek that out - I don't feel bad or try to make them feel bad for that decision.
But I no more want a client telling me HOW to do my work than I would think of telling my plumber or car mechanic how to do theirs!
I am more than happy to listen to everything they want and need to tell me about their physical conditions and their past experiences but I can only do the work that I do and would never want to be a copy of what someone else does. If that was the way massage therapy was, then everybody would just buy a massage machine!

 

[lovy<3]

Pain freaks.

I don't see it that way at all - but of course it probably depends on the tone of voice.

It's definitely not always the case and always depends on how you say it and how someone takes it- a lot of variables. I've just heard people say things like that not only about massage, but in a variety of different professions that make them seem.... haughty? Like they're better than their colleagues? Even if they ARE, it changes my personal point of view of them to immature and just trying to make their perceived competition seem like a squandry compared to them.

As has been said many times in the past, it is about educating the client.

You are completely right, and I think as long as we can keep this in mind rather than trying pointing out that someone else does incorrect/ineffective work, it greatly reduces the chance of making you appear like you think you are high & mighty

 

[MisterTattiePie4U]

Pain freaks.

A new client came today by referral. He was in pain. He used to go and see an MT and bragged that she said he could take more pressure than any other of her patients.

Then I asked, and how was that for you? Well, he said, I always left there sore, but looser.

I explained that what I do is very different to what he is used to, and he might feel like nothing is happening at first. Then he started to feel the pain going and the fascia softening. He left very happy.

One can always explain that, just like there is a wide range of massage, perhaps from Therapeutic Touch to Shiatsu, there is also a range of Myofascial Release, perhaps from Rolfing to CST.

Don't you love when they bend down to do up their shoes and say, I couldn't do that earlier today!

One by one I like to convert them!

 

[Joe B]

Pain freaks.

I have noticed that most of the people that request the “over the top" deep pressure that I am not comfortable giving have other issues. Quite often they are the ones that have injured themselves starting an exercise routine that is too aggressive. Then they come for some "really deep work" to “fix” the injury. They play hard, diet hard and generally don't listen to their bodies. It seems to me to be a form of self punishment.

YES, YES, YES!! I have a few of those. Not all of my pain freaks fit this profile, but a few of them do. I have quite a few that admit to abusing their bodies and then put the responsibility on me to "fix" them! I did tell one client that "I provide a service, I do not claim to treat, and I don't diagnose or prescribe". I was very stern with him and his "fix me!" attitude. He was basically very irresponsible with his own health and wanted to put the responsibility onto me! I will not tolerate that type of client anymore.

I would never put down another therapists technique, since I myself am guilty (for lack of a better word) of providing this type of treatment. I do think deep work has its place and perhaps that is just where this particular client is in their healing journey. I just get frustrated when they are stuck at this point and don't want to progress. They refuse to try anything new or let down their guard and take off that armour. Its just exhausting working with those types of clients.

 

[cajuncutie]

Pain freaks.

INTERESTING DILEMMA! Do you use T-bars in your therapy?
It's good to be asking yourself if your present clients have the bodily awareness they need for the therapy they are receiving. I work on very out of touch people and VERY self aware people and the difference is...palpable.
YOU ARE A GROWING HUMAN, a GROWING, ever changing therapist. Fact of the matter is, if you don't resonate with the therapy you are performing, it won't be good. And that is very easy for your clients to feel, as well. I suggest referring your PainFreaks out to other therapists who DO resonate with this therapy, it's fair for both you and your clients. You DO what you can and want, and they GET what they can and want. Maybe even gradually tell them, and slowly introduce more Non-Pain-Freak clients before you go and dump everyone, since you say this is the majority of your clientele.
It might also be good to educate your clients on the interconnection within the human body. working one area is NOT therapeutic, and doing so for an hour or 90'' could EASILY become a serious case of overtreatment. :\
i wish you the best!
Bless!