Polish divorce

[Billy Ray Joe Bob]

A Polish man moved to the UK and married a British girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day he rushed into a solicitor's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him - "very quick!!."

The solicitor said that the speed for getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

Solicitor: "Have you any grounds?"
Pole: "JA, JA, acre and half and nice little home."
Solicitor: "No," I mean what is the foundation of this case?
Pole: "It made of concrete."
Solicitor: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"
Pole: "No, we have driveway, and not need one."
Solicitor: "I mean, What are your relations like?"
Pole: "All my relations still in Poland."
Solicitor: "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
Pole: "Ja, we have hi- fidelity stereo set and good DVD player."
Solicitor: Does your wife beat you up?"
Pole: "No, I always up before her."
Solicitor: "Is your wife a nagger?"
Pole: "No, she white."
Solicitor: "WHY do you want this divorce?"
Pole: "She going to kill me."
Solicitor: "What makes you think that?"
Pole: "I got proof.
Solicitor: "What kind of proof?"
Pole: "She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read, and it say, 'Polish Remover'."