The elderly man told his wife he was going to sign up for social security. She says, 'You can't do that, you lost your birth certificate.' He says, 'Oh I'll talk them into it.' So when he returns the next day, he is all smiles and says, 'I'm all signed up and no problems.' ' Well, how did you do that?' she asks. He replies, 'I took off my shirt and showed her all the gray hair on my chest, and showed her all the gray hair on my head.' The wife states, 'Well, why didn't you drop your pants, we could have gotten disability.'