The Last Laugh

[sqemyutwivuiheeck]

A nasty man (can you believe it?) gave his now ex-wife just 3 days to move out. She spent the
first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates, and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining
room table by candlelight, put on some soft music, and feasted on a pound of
shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay. When she had finished,
she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp
shells dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods. She then
cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When her husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the
first few days. Then slowly the house began to smell. They tried everything;
cleaning and mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead
rodents, carpets were steamed cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.
Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they
had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid for to replace
the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit ... repairmen refused to
work in the house ... the maid quit ... Finally, they could not take the
stench any longer and decided to move. A month later, even though they had
cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house.
Word got out, and eventually even the local Realtors refused to return their
calls.

Finally they had to borrow a large sum of money from the bank to purchase a
new place.

The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going. He told her the
saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said that she missed
her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement
in exchange for getting the house back ... knowing his ex-wife had no idea
how bad the smell was, he agreed to the price that was about 1/10th of what
the house had been worth ... but only if she were to sign the papers that
very day. She agreed, and within the hour, his lawyer delivered the
paperwork.

A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as they watched
the moving company pack everything to take to their new home ... ...
including the curtain rods.

 

[omnomnombunny<3]

Hello
I am pretty new to HP and am looking through all the forums - but this was just delightful and has really made me smile.
Lovely - must see if I can remember it to tell to someone else now.
Many thanks
Rachel