Chat Does my favourite MPA like me or not???

[OG_funguy]

You tried to tip more, she refused. You then tried to buy her gifts, she refused again.
Doesn't seem to be a gold-digger to me.
Maybe it's because she knew you are married and doesn't see a future in you two.

I'm thinking the same...

 

[JaimeWolf]

Yeah, I don't even pay her the norm anymore for her services. Maybe the amount was okay two years ago with the limited services I got back then but it should be higher now. Oh well, I've tried...

Splitting hairs as you aren't getting BJ or FS with her anyway...

 

[OG_funguy]

I agree that what's stopping her is the fact that you're married.

So would you leave your wife and family for her if you were convinced she loves you and would want to be your "significant other"? Would she stop being an MPA in that circumstance?

Good questions. Don't know about the first one but honestly probably not, at least not right now (it's a tough one though). For the 2nd one, I'm quite certain she would stop. She's only doing it out of necessity. Again, she's not a high mileage, make tons of money kind of girl but like everyone else, she has bills to pay.

 

[OG_funguy]

Splitting hairs as you aren't getting BJ or FS with her anyway...

agreed

 

[gottahobby]

Been there. I was seeing a lady for sometime
We shared everything pictures of each other family
To texting or phone calls.
Been to her house and went for dinner lots of times she worked at a no fs spa but I got fs
When she retired I got blocked on all forms of communication. Lesson learned don’t get attached to the ladies have fun but they are only there to make money and hope you come back. What ever you decide I hope it works out for you

Yeah I've been there too. Not sharing personal info, pictures, or actual phone calls, but sometimes random flirty texts in between sessions.

Then when the mpas left the business total radio silence, as if I never existed. I would send a goodbye text thanking them for the good times and expressing best wishes for the future, but never a reply.

So now I consider that the norm when they leave the business, but I still send the "goodbye, thanks, and good luck" text as I think it's the right thing to do, and in a way it gives me closure regarding whatever fondness I felt for the lady.

 

[Deleted member 64273]

Wait, 2 years and you haven't gotten sex? Now it sounds like she might be stringing you along. I don't know what you do in your sessions and you don't need to share, but 2 years? It's not a relationship and don't treat it like one. Don't fall in love in this hobby. It ain't worth it.

 

[Homerun001]

Wait, 2 years and you haven't gotten sex? Now it sounds like she might be stringing you along. I don't know what you do in your sessions and you don't need to share, but 2 years? It's not a relationship and don't treat it like one. Don't fall in love in this hobby. It ain't worth it.

From talking with an ex MPA, most who date, and end up leaving the biz leave for a guy who did not hobby. There is just too much jealousy and trust issues between a hobbyist and MPA knowing what goes on behind closed doors and those relationships fail for obvious reasons.

 

[Shag]

$$ = MPA

If you take money out of the equation,
then it is love

 

[AthleticAF]

She's got a strong game this one, rejecting gifts, pretending the relationship is real.
So then you'll take it a step further (her hopes and wishes), spending foolishly on her and when she's done with you, cya later.

Don't fall for it man.

 

[OG_funguy]

Everyone wants something fresh and new, the chase can be is a lot more exciting.
I’m telling you just get your weekly massage and go home to your family. You prob will be disappointed if you ever get a chance for FS. (you’ve prob built it up too much in your head by now).

She’s smart, she’s giving you mixed signals to confuse you and get you to come back. She prob knows if she gives you FS you won’t be back. The ones who have done this for 10+ years know how to play the game. Don’t be naive.

I hear what you're saying but the end goal is not even FS for me. I really don't care too much about that (but of course I'll take it). The end goal for me is to just spend quality time with her outside the MP to see how much we actually like each other. I'm being serious, that's why I think this one is different. Yeah, call me a puss...Oh, although she's been here for many years, she's only been doing massage for around 4-5 years (and at the beginning, the place was legit). I know I may sound naive saying this but believe me, she's not into playing games. I actually told her what she could do (within reason) to get more regulars but she doesn't care about that. She's content with 2 or 3 customers a day (and where she works, they are often very old guys).

 

[OG_funguy]

Yeah I've been there too. Not sharing personal info, pictures, or actual phone calls, but sometimes random flirty texts in between sessions.

Then when the mpas left the business total radio silence, as if I never existed. I would send a goodbye text thanking them for the good times and expressing best wishes for the future, but never a reply.

So now I consider that the norm when they leave the business, but I still send the "goodbye, thanks, and good luck" text as I think it's the right thing to do, and in a way it gives me closure regarding whatever fondness I felt for the lady.

I know enough of her personal life that I could probably find her for proper closure if it came down to that, but hopefully it doesn't. What you experienced is cold though, definitely hope it doesn't happen to me or anyone else here for that matter.

 

[titgrabber]

I think they like you 30 minutes at a time.

 

[OG_funguy]

I think they like you 30 minutes at a time.

LOL but in my case it's 1 hr at a time...

 

[OG_funguy]

Wait, 2 years and you haven't gotten sex? Now it sounds like she might be stringing you along. I don't know what you do in your sessions and you don't need to share, but 2 years? It's not a relationship and don't treat it like one. Don't fall in love in this hobby. It ain't worth it.

I know what I'm about to say will sound ludicrous to most of you but here it goes. She's only had sex with one man before, i.e. her ex-husband. She's never given a BJ and never had DATY before in her life (I did mention in my original post that she's very inexperienced sexually). She has never even seen porn before. I once showed her a porn clip and she turned all red and couldn't even watch it. Now, she has shared with me other very intimate details which is why there's really no reason for her to make up the sex, BJ, DATY stuff. Guys, keep in mind she's older and would have grown up in China in a very traditional way. Yes I know, having said this, it's ironic she's an MPA giving guys HJs now. But I hope this sheds more light in why I haven't gotten FS or BJ yet (again, this is not even important to me with this girl...I can get those elsewhere).

 

[gottahobby]

From my limited experience with older ladies who grew up in China oral sex giving and receiving is considered "dirty". When I mention daty they make a disgusted face and refuse it.

On the other hand most younger and Canadian born Chinese girls think daty is a great idea, and seem to enjoy it immensely!

 

[Leviathan]

The narrative never changes only the cast of characters . I just chuckle at the “ words of wisdom” guys . Blah blah . Everyone has their own motivations and needs as well unique experiences. Nobody knows shit about the poster or girl. Assumptions are being made from their own biased experiences or judgemental attitudes.

Just let it be. Life is about unique experiences. Things happen for a reason and let it unfold - whether it’s joy or pain. We are all adults and make our own decisions and own up to any implications.

This poster knows exactly what’s going on and enjoys those taboo intimate emotional moments at the expense of boring marriage and family life. It’s “high school love” relived and thrill of the chase. Plain Jane village girl rejecting my advances ? WTF? LoL. Duh ???

Why would she emotionally invest in you? Simple answer. Not worth the heart break.

Risk vs Reward calculation - physical, mental/emotional and/or financial . LoL

 

[OG_funguy]

From my limited experience with older ladies who grew up in China oral sex giving and receiving is considered "dirty". When I mention daty they make a disgusted face and refuse it.

On the other hand most younger and Canadian born Chinese girls think daty is a great idea, and seem to enjoy it immensely!

This is exactly it...

 

[OG_funguy]

The narrative never changes only the cast of characters . I just chuckle at the “ words of wisdom” guys . Blah blah . Everyone has their own motivations and needs as well unique experiences. Nobody knows shit about the poster or girl. Assumptions are being made from their own biased experiences or judgemental attitudes.

Just let it be. Life is about unique experiences. Things happen for a reason and let it unfold - whether it’s joy or pain. We are all adults and make our own decisions and own up to any implications.

This poster knows exactly what’s going on and enjoys those taboo intimate emotional moments at the expense of boring marriage and family life. It’s “high school love” relived and thrill of the chase. Plain Jane village girl rejecting my advances ? WTF? LoL. Duh ???

Why would she emotionally invest in you? Simple answer. Not worth the heart break.

Risk vs Reward calculation - physical, mental/emotional and/or financial . LoL

All great points with elements of truth in all of them (e.g. there's definitely some truth in "high school love", "intimate emotional moments", WTF plain jane village girl rejecting me, LOL). My sweetie would also definitely agree with your second sentence about "just let it be...things happen for a reason...blah blah blah". That's her mentality.

 

[OG_funguy]

She's got a strong game this one, rejecting gifts, pretending the relationship is real.
So then you'll take it a step further (her hopes and wishes), spending foolishly on her and when she's done with you, cya later.

Don't fall for it man.

Like your thinking but I don't think it applies here. She's very simplistic and doesn't care about materialistic things (again, traditional chinese woman). For example, if I offer to buy her a pair of shoes for an upcoming event, she'll say why, she doesn't need it. She will accept simple things like fruit which we end up sharing anyways.

If she's playing a game, it's a dangerous one. I've already told her that I might start visiting other MPs (in fact, I've already started doing this). So at the very least, she risks losing a friend and great customer. At worst, she will lose someone she actually cares deeply about. But this is what makes her both intriguing and frustrating at the same time. She is a very proud and stubborn person with a strong belief system. It would be interesting to see what would happen if I just stopped all communications with her...I really don't know who would break first. Regardless, if she is playing a game, it's a lose-lose situation (for both of us).

 

[Deleted member 64273]

I know what I'm about to say will sound ludicrous to most of you but here it goes. She's only had sex with one man before, i.e. her ex-husband. She's never given a BJ and never had DATY before in her life (I did mention in my original post that she's very inexperienced sexually). She has never even seen porn before. I once showed her a porn clip and she turned all red and couldn't even watch it. Now, she has shared with me other very intimate details which is why there's really no reason for her to make up the sex, BJ, DATY stuff. Guys, keep in mind she's older and would have grown up in China in a very traditional way. Yes I know, having said this, it's ironic she's an MPA giving guys HJs now. But I hope this sheds more light in why I haven't gotten FS or BJ yet (again, this is not even important to me with this girl...I can get those elsewhere).

So, she likes you, but you're digging a hole for yourself. You see in her something you're not getting at home. Is it worth it? Only you can answer that. Look what happened to LostInnocence. At least he was getting sex - presumably. The only way not to fall into the rabbit hole is to not dig one.