Any help for this distressing condition?

Butch449854

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Hi everyone, I wonder if any more experienced reflexologists out there could offer some advice/thoughts on this issue. It would help me so much.

Briefly, my Dad, who is 87 has been diagnosed with vascular dementia. He and Mum live in Cheshire and although I visit as much as possible (travelling up from Herts.) it's difficult to be able to help as much as I'd like. However, I have several brothers and sisters who all visit as much as they can, too.

One of the most distressing aspects of this dementia is the constant restless and agitated state of the person affected.

My question is, if Dad is willing to sit down and put his feet up, will there be any tangible benefit to him from a reflexology treatment? Obviously (following training guidelines) I'd make treatments a lot shorter, lighter and involving more relaxation moves. Has anyone experienced in elderly care Rx. found it can offer a respite - even tho' brief - from the upheaval and turmoil of this heartbreaking condition?
I don't want to 'blunder in' but am thinking that it may just help to calm and relax. The medication he is on doesn't seem to do this at all.

p.s: I asked his GP, last time we had a 'family visit' in Feb, if it would be ok to
treat Dad and he said he thought he 'might enjoy it' Dad also has a heart condition (controlled with medication) so I made a point of asking for this permission.

Your thoughts and/or experiences around this condition and with clients who are very elderly would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you so much.

Marie
xx
 
Hi Marie,

It is certainly worth a try - especially a shortened treatment with a focus on the nervous sytem. Also try burning some essential oils, to calm and relax such as Lavender (Astrological rulership Mercury).

The difficulty as you said is getting your Dad to sit still for long enough. Also I have heard of very good results with reiki and parkinsons disease. The person I am thinking of when he has reiki stops shaking. His wife is also a reflexologist and the initial prognosis of the deterioration of the illness has not happened.

I have not personally treated anyone with dementia, but it may be a very good idea to find someone who has and if you contact the Association of Reflexologists,
http://www.aor.org.uk/
or the British Reflexology Association
http://www.britreflex.co.uk/
they may be able to point you in the direction of a therapist who lives nearby to your father. If you do find someone let us know how your dad gets on wont you?

Luv Binah
 
Hi
I am sorry to hear this about your dad. I cannot offer much support really except for the fact that I have a 78 almost 79 year old lady client - who I know feel is a friend and her husband passed a couple of years ago and feels very lonely too. She has lots of medication including steriods for lots of ailments and pain. She has had about 7 treatments now - some monthly some fortnightly and she benefits tremendously from reflexology. This lady is very stressed and cannot relax her legs whilst in the reflexology chair even though I try to ask her to relax a few times during the session but she has improved!

I think it can only help things with your dad....it may take a few sessions for him to settle but he may find he enjoys it - only one way to find out! Go easy and just enjoy it too. Time for you and your dad to spend some lovely quality time together. Soft music and soft lighting and he may even fall asleep??!!

Just be there for him whenever you can - you are doing your best - and offering to give him reflexology may be just what he needs.

Take care
Love light and harmony
T x
 
I have several dementia and Alzhiemer clients. Over the years, we have had to stop using 'feet' and have moved to hands instead. I do not 'treat' using reflexology, but simply use the relaxation moves by way of a 'massage'. Sadly, recently, I had to stop visiting one of them, as increasingly over the last 6 months, he has become very physical - even with his immediate family and care team, and will hit out at anyone. A couple of them take at least 5 minutes to work out what I am doing, and now have no idea who I am (having treated them for more than 8 years) - but I always treat them gently, and make sure there is a carer or relative in the room. It is such a dreadful condition, but if you can find any way to initiate simple relaxation, then go for it - try starting with the hands if he is agitated.
 
Thank you Binah, TGJ, and Jabba for your very helpful replies.

I am due to pay another visit to Dad on Sunday, staying til Wednesday. It's getting harder and harder to walk through the front door each time; at the moment he still knows his sons and daughters but he's getting more and more confused, and giving my poor Mum (who's 86 this week) a real run-around.

I'm sure Dad will allow himself to be 'worked on' at the moment - as you suggest, it's better to give mostly relaxation. It would be wonderful if he at least had a more peaceful sleep as a result. I can only try. Will report back.
Thanks again for support.

xx
 
Oops, sorry TJG ( got your name backwards!) I also accidentally posted this thread in the 'interesting websites' area of the forum, and it was moved for me. One of those days (lol)
x
 
Jabba - I am wondering how you get round the issue of consent when clients are not actually sure what you are doing.

I only ask this, as I work for a cancer charity and I have been in the situation where I have been treating someone who doesn't really acknowledge that I'm there, rolls into a ball and goes to sleep. This was a bit difficult when I was trying to give her an aromatherapy treatment, even though I was only giving gentle massage to her arms and legs. She'd wake up every so often, not knowing who I was. I just felt very uneasy that she may not have wanted the treatments and wasn't able to let me know. Her family members did want her to have the treatments, btw, but only because they thought I might be able to 'change things', which was unrealistic.

I am very conscious that with vulnerable clients, I obtain their verbal consent to treat, each and every time. I would hate any relatives to ever think there was an element of coercion in any treatment that I did. This actually happened to my grandmother when she was in a care home. She was offered aromatherapy, reflexology, etc, not really knowing what any of it was, and blindly accepted everything until my mother was presented with a huge bill and the home were investigated for allowing this to happen.

Sorry if it's slightly off topic to the original post, but I do think it's relevant.
 
Issue of consent - from the client or the carer? It is a very grey area. I gave up writing to GP's asking for 'consent' as I never got replies. I now just write to them, out of courtesy, telling them that I have been approached by the family one of their patients, to treat them using complementary therapy, and if they believe there is any underlying or known medical condition that would preclude this, to please contact me. I always enclose a SSAE, but have only once got a reply - and that was to say 'said patient will probably enjoy a massage'.... 99% of the time, it is family members who contact me, hoping that comp therapies might reverse the problem! As I mentioned, I have been treating some people for years, and knew them before the deterioration of the condition. I will not treat people who are already seriously affected, and find that their relatives are desparately trying to find some form of 'cure', which is why they contact me. Common sense has to prevail. Thinking about your situation with the lady you describe in your post above - is she a palliative patient? I would immediately stop treatment if anyone showed distress at me being there - it has happened, and that has been the indicator that enough is enough. If, as in the case of Mr M in my original post, they become aggitated and frightened, I withdraw immediately. I also make sure that there is a carer or family member in the room (if being treated in a residential home) or in calling distance if being treated in the house.
 
Thanks for that, Jabba.

I did mean consent from the client themselves (I agree with you about GP consent and in the cfase of the charity I work for, they write to the client's GP out of courtesy, when the client begins therapies or counselling with us.)

Yes, this lady was only receiving palliative care, but her confusion was such that she often did consent at the beginning of the treatment, but then got confused during the treatment, often falling into a deep sleep and not knowing who I was. After discussing this with the nursing staff at the home, who told me that they found it difficult to wake her after treatments, so she could not eat her next meal, and with my seniors at the charity, we all felt she wasn't really benefitting from the treatments and I let her family know that I would be stopping them.
 
In reply to your dad's condition, I would have thought it would be most beneficial. I am a clinical reflexologist and have been for many years full time in this profession. I treat many elderly people some in their late 80's and even my aunt who is 93. I cannot see any reason why as long as he is able to move his feet and has not an underlying conditions you could do a full treatment. Albeit you might do it more gently, but that depends on how he reacts. I would do it more gently at first and then see how you go. It has to be of benefit, as it is so relaxing. However I would not suggest any one who is not qualified doing it, as the pressure must be even, and people who are inexperienced tend to have uneven pressure. Also I never use cream only a powder base as you slip and cannot feel with cream or lotion. I only apply that at the very end as a masage treat.
 
On the subject of consent - I really do think it becomes evident if someone does not want the treatment. In a palliative care situation, sometimes short treatments are better received.

When I worked at the hospice I would always ask either the nurses or I myself would ask the patient if they wanted a treatment, and would then use my own judgement on how long was ok for that client. They were never charged for any treatments so it wasn't an issue about money. However, I do agree it is important to get consent from a patient. Some of the patients I saw could only answer by blinking, as they couldn't communicate in any other way.

Hopefully your relative will enjoy and benefit from reflexology treatments.

Luv Binah
 
Have been reading with interest everyone's input on dealing with elderly/ confused/very sick clients. Francoisgarcia, thanks for adding your encouraging information also.
I guess I do feel unsure about this issue because in any case the oldest client I have treated so far was 75 - and in pretty good health. But obviously I am more than willing to build experience in as many areas of health as poss - and do believe that Reflex can and should benefit almost anyone.

A bit of a sad point is that my lovely Dad - when he was himself (up to about 7 months ago) was the most keen and committed supporter of Complementary therapies (of all kinds) that you could meet. He was delighted that I was doing my Reflexology course and all through the wait for exam results asked me every day: Have you heard the good news, yet?
Bless him.

Love to All. Trying to keep positive!

xx
 
Yesterday evening I heard the sad news that my Dad, who is 87 and had been suffering from Dementia has died.
Some of you may remember that in early April I was asking for HP Members' thoughts/opinions on whether to give a short Refelexology to Dad, as I was so desperate to offer any comfort or peace that could be gleaned in the bad situation. Well, I did give two, actually. One for 10 mins and one for about 20. Dad was perfectly willing, smiled and fell almost instantly into a deepish sleep (unfortunately, my timing wasn't right because we then had to try and wake him up for a bit of dinner!)
But I'm so glad I did it - shortly afterwards he had to go into a Home, which none of us wanted,(too much disrupted sleep for Mum, who's 86) - and me and Hubby were due to visit him there on Saturday (distance of about 180 miles)
Anyway, I just wanted to share - and thanks for reading this. The country has lost a great Champion of all Natural and Complementary therapies - Dad was particularly keen on Naturopathy and Herbal Remedies which he used a lot - and I have lost a lovely Dad.

Love and Blessings,
Marie
x
 
Oh Marie,

So sad to hear about the loss of a great Dad. I am glad you managed to do at least a bit of reflexology for him and that he enjoyed it. Be strong.

Thoughts and prayes coming to you and your family.
 
When they are at peace... we are also at peace. Many years ago I lost my mum through cancer. I had to nurse her in the last stages as we had difficulty in getting a helper. My wife was in London working and I was in my home country- thankfully I was made redundant at the right time so I could spend time with her. Although I was then not a reflexologist (I'm recently qualified) what ever time we had spent with our loved ones is good time spent esp. with our hands and touch.

Keep smiling and may you move forward brightfully.
 
Hi Marie - so sorry to hear your news, but so glad that you were able to give him some treatment when you could. Hugs to you.
 
Hi Marie,

I am so sorry to hear of your sad news and I am pleased you had the opportunity to give your Dad some reflexology, which by the sound of it really helped him.

Sending you and your Mum some reiki healing.

Luv Binah
x
 
Hi ya AT

Sorry to here about your loss. It's really good that you gave him some reflexology and I'm sure he appreciated it being his daughter and your loving touch, and being a champion for natural therapies.

Best Wishes

Dave
 
Thank you so much for your kind replies and good wishes. It has helped a lot.

xx
 
I am sorry to hear that you have lost your dad, it is wonderful that you did share your experience and knowledge of reflexology with him twice, the longer treatment the second time is perhaps a sure sign that he really was enjoying it. It is wonderful that you were able to share some healing energies with him. He was probably not just a Champion of the natural therapies but also a champion dad, so enjoy the memories and all he has been to you, this you will take with you everywhere, keep this warmth close.
 
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  39. Jenny’s Spa:
    ✅💋🔥GOOD NEWS GOOD NEWS✅💋🔥 💋Cambodian Princess Suki will return to Jenny’s Spa next Tuesday June 3rd💋 😘The famous superstar Cambodian Princess Suki from Annie Spa will be working at Jenny’s Spa in Etobicoke next Tuesday June 3rd with Tina & Jenny😘 🎉🍒JENNY’S SPA🎉🍒 ✅5170 DUNDAS STREET WEST✅ 👌ETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4👌 ☎️( 647-893-5196)☎️Call or Text ☎️( 437-888-3759)☎️Call Only OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY Suki😍is beautiful short petite tiny sexy student from Camb
  40. AliceSpa:
    TUESDAY at 𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗖𝗘 𝗦𝗣𝗔, 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough 𝟰𝟭𝟲-𝟮𝟵𝟴-𝟬𝟴𝟵𝟴. 2 Young Beauties Today at Alice Spa. Open 10am to 9pm: AMY (10am – 9pm) is a young, petite short & slim Taiwanese, former dance instructor, firm natural B Cups, pretty face, firm natural titis, super play good, bbbj, cim, rim, dfk, all services. JESSICA (3pm-9pm) is from Hong Kong, super busty D Cup, 5'2", 109 Lbs
  41. ForeverWarden:
    Tuesday at 🫦❤️🔴🟥♾️𝓕𝓞𝓡𝓔𝓥𝓔𝓡 𝓢𝓟𝓐♾️🟥🔴❤️🫦2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough 𝟰𝟭𝟲-𝟴𝟬𝟬-𝟳𝟴𝟴𝟳: Cindy, Tracy & Vivian. Cindy is a slim beauty, 5’4”, natural C Cups. Her massage is nice, her services will drive you wild & her finish is a dream come true. Tracy is an incredibly cute & pretty Japanese/Taiwanese mixed spinner, about 5’1” and 100 lbs. She is very popular for her exotic massage & services.
  42. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 4 young girls are working today, young fun Ivy 36DD with big buttocks 30’s open mind and young cute slime Sophia 30’s, young flirty Mia 25’ with curve body and pretty GFE Lina are providing deep tissue massage, pls call 4163985777 bomok appointment and walk in always welcome,back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  43. HolidaySpa:
    Tuesday at 🌴😎🌅𝓗𝓸𝓵𝓲𝓭𝓪𝔂 𝓢𝓹𝓪🌅😎🌴3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough ☎️𝟰𝟯𝟳-𝟮𝟰𝟳-𝟭𝟭𝟵𝟵☎️: EMMA, JENNY & CINDY. EMMA is a very beautiful slim Chinese honey with C Cups, beauty face, & nice services to drive you wild. Jenny has a medium build, nicely curvy with a slim waist, pretty face, and very flexible skills. Jenny will make you very happy. CINDY is slim & incredible
  44. starjey888:
    Cof
  45. SugarLoveSpa:
    Tuesday at ❤️💙 💜⎝𝗦𝗨𝗚𝗔𝗥 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗦𝗣𝗔⎠💖💗💘: CHRISTINA, MIA & TIFFANY. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York. CHRISTINA is Spanish, C Cups, 5'3", tall & nice curves, very open minded. MIA is a young & slim 𝙎𝙋𝙄𝙉𝙉𝙀𝙍, very PRETTY & PETITE Vietnamese beauty with perfect natural A Cups, 5’1” & 90 Lbs, very versatile. Come and enjoy. TIFFANY is an amazing slim petite
  46. すみません:
    Larissa , Gabby , Sunny, Kimmie , Christine and new Lora on duty at top norch wellness. Call 437-522-9961 now
  47. EMSpa_schedule:
    🎉Come visit us!🎉 Today (Tuesday), our amazing attendants are Ada 💜, Christina 🤩, Cici 🤗, Ivy 😘, Monica 🥰 and Connie 🥰. Call us at ☎️ (905) 479-6668 ☎️ to book your favourite and head on over to 7665 Kennedy Road, Unit 4, Markham!
  48. Red Rose Spa:
    🌸 We have 5 hot brown girls today 🌸 MONICA, ASHA, JANVI, MONIKA, SASHA, AMANDA, PAOLA, MALIYA, PREET, SARIKA, KIRAN 🌸 2588 Birchmount 🌸 2 Invergordon 🌸 647-702-8800 🌸 Please visit for a great erotic massage
  49. Annie Spa:
    🎉🍒ANNIE SPA🎉🍒 ✅7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLE✅ 👌SCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6👌 ☎️ (647) 891-9688☎️ ☎️ (416) 291-8879☎️ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 9:30am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY 🔥✅NEW MANAGEMENT💯NEW GIRLS🔥🔥 🔥GORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAY’s ROSTER INCLUDES: 🔥 Angel 💕 Very beautiful girl from Taiwan, very curvy, young and sexy, she can provide a great massage and wonderful touch and super service. Angel is so sexy, especially her 34C breasts and her big juicy tight bum you can wors
  50. Spa in Markham:
    GOLDEN FS – 8380 Kennedy Rd, Unit C6 📞 905-258-0777 / 416-688-6886 🇻🇳 ROXY, 🇲🇾 AMY, 🇻🇳 MIKA, 🇨🇴 MEGAN (7PM) 🔎 Schedule: bit.ly/flowers_schedule 🛎️ Booking: bit.ly/bookinggoldenlove
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