Best joke?

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    best
A guy goes to the markets but he doesn't speak English very well.
He walks up to a stall and asks "Can I have a Fuck it?"
"Oh you must mean a Bucket" says the shop owner
"one of those please" he replies
He then Walk over to the bakery "Can I have a Bum please?"
"Oh you must mean a bun." says the shop owner
"Yeah one of those Please" he replies
Then he goes to the pet store. "Can I have a Cock-and-spank-it?"
"Oh you must mean a Cocker spaniel" says the shop owner
"yes One of those please" he replies
The man walks out of the shop and his dog runs away, he turns to the guy next to him and says "Can you hold my Bum and Fuck it While I go get my cock and spank it"
 
Two sanitary pads were floating down a sewer drain, and were approaching two tampons. Before the pads and tampons reached each other, one pad said to the other,
"Should we say hi to those 2 tampons?"
The other pad responded, "Err... nah... they're stuck up c*nts."
 
A guy dressed in black with a multi-colored Mohawk walks up to a bench and sits down next to an old man..
The guy notices after a moment, that the man is staring at him.
Guy: "What, old man? Aint you ever had fun before? Jeez."
Man:" Yeah.. I fu.cked a parrot before.. And I was trying to see if you're my son.. "



 
NEVER MINDD !
I got Emmah to explain it to me !
Lmfaoo. ];
Funny.
 
W-...... :banghead: I didn't get the joke. :(

A guy and girl are playing spin the bottle....
the bottle lands on the girl's tits.....
The guy asks "Is that where I get to kiss her?"
The girl stands up.... waves her titties in the air and says, "Here they are, big boy :blush: "


Yeah I know that joke is lame. I made it up in my head. :ashamed:​
 
Omg I smiled so big that my cheeks ripped in half. (My face cheeks :lol:)
 
OH MY GOD LOL it seriously took me like a minute to get the joke :lmao:
 
Lol, the one that I posted with the name of the thread being "Dirty Joke"..
I couldn't stop laughing when my friend told me it. D;
 
[FONT=Courier New, Courier, mono]A man with no arms and no legs is out lying on the beach one day, enjoying his chance to get some sun. All of a sudden, a beautiful woman walks by and stops. "You poor man," she says. "I bet you've never been kissed have you?"

The man has to admit, no, he never has, so she bends down and plants a good one right on the mouth.

A few minutes later, another gorgeous babe walks up. "You look like you need a hug," she says.

He agrees that would be nice, she gives him a great one, and walks away.

A few minutes later, a drop-dead gorgeous girl walks by. She stops, a sultry smile on her face and looks down at him.

"Mister," she says, "Have you ever been
fucked?"

"No," he says with a hopeful grin.

"Well, you are now. The tide's coming in."

[/FONT]​
 
I laughed so hard that I nearly peed a little :blush:
 
A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this... 'Looking for man with these qualifications; won't beat me up; or run away from me and is great in bed.'
She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at her door one day.
The man she met said, "Hi, I'm Bob. I have no arms so I won't beat you up and no legs so I won't run away."
So the lady says, "What makes you think you are great in bed?"
Bob replies, "I rang the door bell didn't I?"
 
Why is it hard for a women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking ?


Because those men already have boy friends.
 
Jones Girl [x];3755233']
LMFAO that made me smile first thing in the morning :lol:


 
[QUOTE=Builder Dude 1;3752086] How are women and tornadoes a like ?

They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave. [/QUOTE]

Fantastic :clap
 
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  44. Lulu1980:
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  46. EMSpa_schedule:
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  47. Shangri-la Spa:
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