Can a POF profile be too good?

[diana lisa]

Good points K, but still, like many men, he will still get emails from those that don't fit the criteria....nothing you can do about them however.

On reading many profiles you see a LOT that state no pic/no response. Many state that "since I have a pic, it's only fair that you do" so that could cut down on a lot.

It's a double edge sword however, you put too many restrictions and he may find his inbox suddenly gets emptied and stays empty lol.....

Don't know if I should say this but I've seen the profile and believe me, it IS the eptiome of what I think women want. He's got it all....no wonder he is Mr Popular. After reading thousands of female's posts, and after years of hearing what women look for in a man, Player has it down. ......mine on the other hand is written for that one in a million who "gets" me and my sense of humor. If I never meet her or she doesn't find me, so be it...I'm fine with that.....

 

[danielle w]

Thanks Kyra for the excellent ideas, they are truly appreciated. I'm sure a couple of them will be put into place shortly and will help a great deal.

One thing is irking me a bit though, and I'm not sure if I'm taking it the wrong way.



Honestly, my intention is not to be the catch of the day. My sincere goal is to find a long term partner. Unfortunately my last relationship did not work out the way I had hoped, but I'm now a little stronger, and a whole bunch wiser as to what I need and require. My goal is NOT to attract as many women as possible, but to attract the ONE woman that is the perfect match for me, with the qualities I desire. I only tried to express myself in a way which truly reflects my personality, (which I find exceedingly hard to do in text), and convey the qualities which I need to be fulfilled.

If I took your quote the wrong way, my sincere apologies.

 

[stienbabe]

Hey Playa (you ought to change your handle lol) I can't speak for the intentions of the "label" but I think she means it in a way that you are a great "catch" (a term thrown around a LOT on a site about fishing lol).

Take it as a compliment, it's far better to be the catch of the day as opposed to the dregs in the bottom of the net!

I think if you really want just "one", you ought to be pretty damn specific in your wants category. Otherwise you are appealing to the masses and that's what you are going to get: mass responses. But remember the old marketing adage that applies to finding "the one": if you send out a mass mailer to 100 recipients, you're going to get 10 responses. Of those 10 1 might be a truly qualified "customer". So to get 10 "customers" you need to hit 10,000 with your ad.

 

[evilberet]

But from whay tboy is saying I'm thinking you've fine-tuned your profile to suit what women seem to want. Are you able to stay true to your wants and ideals?

If so, that's impressive - or are you saying women want to be played and you're playing their game? That's impressive but in a different way. Hope that works too.

 

[I pity duh Tardlings]

What I am saying is that all the information I have presented is the real me, no bullshit, lies or embellishments; presented in a way that reflects my personality and marketed in a manner that is different from the competition and will get me responses. Let's not bullshit here, each and every profile on that site is making a sales pitch of some sort or another. The only difference between mine and many others is that mine is not generic, and that I've worked damn hard on it.

The pictures are all me, exactly what I look like 100%. I KNOW I'm not the best looking or wealthiest man on the site, so I have to sell myself with what I do best... by using my personality. I am not playing anyone on POF, my intentions are clearly stated, and my information is accurate.

 

[Penguinfruit]

Okay, that's excellent. You're no fuji despite the 'playa' tag.
You can afford to lay back and be selective, it must be a bit wearying when people respond without fitting the bill.

 

[v.s]

Dude, 70% of the messages I get are from either women 10+ years older than I am, or morbidly out of shape, or both. It's quite grim really. I can set an age limit (which I am thinking of doing), but one cannot disregard the plainly 'don't give a shit what I look like' types.

 

[U R Sofa King]

But but but you're supposed to like them in spite of the age difference or their appearance lol.....(insert sarcastic laugh here).

I call you playa just as a pun on your handle, I know you're not a playa in the literal sense of the word.

I'm not sure what your experience has been like on POF but it is like 1 in 100 that haven't "hit the wall" as it were. I'm no beauty queen or GQ model myself but I most certainly take care of my body. Why would I settle for a woman 200 lbs heavier than I? The thing is, women aren't expected to and neither will I.

You might even want to copy that profile and put it up on eharmony. You might get better, more accurate responses.

I know you're too nice to insert something like this into your profile, but I would...I'd say something like: "Please, I'm sure you're a great person but if you've got a front bum, and more chins than a chinese phonebook, please don't respond" lol....

 

[Tay B]

Pic? What pic?

 

[Dr. Natural]

 

[Amani]

Player: did you post the photo of you with the goat again? Cheers GB

 

[Pompal 09.]

It would also mean you're allowing other people determine the look and atmosphere of your profile, it takes their focus off how decent a guy you are. Even if appearance and honesty about it is a huge concern don't be bold about it, nothing wrong with strong opinions but people may misjudge and believe it's an obsession instead of a normal observation.

 

[Emmanuel]

people aka women lol.....because we have to remember that it is ok for a woman to be choosy about who she finds attractive but heaven forbid a MAN does the same thing lol......

That's what I find so inane about "the game". You can't come right out and say what's on your mind......you have to choose your words wisely, and organize them in such a way as to not really get your point across, just insinuate what you really mean.

I had a couple of my LTGFs say to me: one of the best things about you is if I ask you what you're thinking, you tell me. One of the worst things about you is if I ask you what you're thinking, you tell me lol......One in particular used to love/hate taking me shopping because she'd come out of the changeroom with something that she positively adored, and ask me if I liked it......most guys would say "oh yes dear" then roll their eyes when she went back inside...me? If I didn't like it I'd say so...

For eg: I was dating this one YL and she went and bought these shoes that she was fricken nuts over....she put them on and came out of the bedroom modelling them for me....what do you think? she asked.....(wrong question to ask me lol). I said "ummm they look like pilgrim shoes" lol.....They do not....I don't care, I like them....

A couple of days later when she was over she came out of the bedroom, and smacked me......I said "what did I do now"??? Fucking pilgrim shoes you ass, I can't fricken wear those shoes now.....lol......

 

[phil8656]

This is where you and I disagree. I absolutely state what is on my mind, and do it clearly and accurately without insinuations, though I do choose my words carefully. That is because I want to be understood, with no miscommunication though.

How does this work...

Though I truly appreciate all the great responses my profile has generated, not to mention the compliments are making me blush a bit, but I ask you to only send a message if you honestly believe we would truly be a good match and compatible with each other intellectually, emotionally and of course physically.

What I want to say is...

If you'd be too embarrassed to try to pick me up in a public place like a grocery store, on the subway, or in a bar, please don't bother here. Also, please don't be a social misfit, I can't stand that.

Dammit tboy, I hate it when you are right.

 

[Roshelle K]

lol don't it just bug ya though when I'm right?

The part where "if you honestly believe we would truly be a good match"......not to speak out of turn or anything, but a 350 lbs woman who loses the remote in her belly fat would "honestly believe you are a good match"....because, of course, she's got a great personality......and the way you've written your profile, all sweetness and sunlight and sensitivity, they'll think "i'm exactly what he wants..."....

Or, kind of like me, if I'm going to get ignored by the uggos, I might as well shoot for the moon and write the total hotties....hell, one of them might be having an off day and write back.......(btw, I did write a total hottie, way outta my league, in toronto, and we did have a nice little chat going, I knew it wasn't going anywhere but it was nice all the same)....

 

[ohyo5o]

What site are you guys talking about?.

 

[FiftySixer]

I get ignored by most of them, some have been on for years without meeting anyone so you know they reject without really reading.
I did write to one my age who was more gorgeous than some 20 years younger and probably had a hundred responses every day. I told her "golf" was my dealbreaker, if she'd quit I'd love to email and then get together. I like to think she considered it, she was so nice to my letter.

 

[a wolf at the door (42)]

Funny enough, what I've found over the years, and this happens in real life too, is that the really beautiful women, are generally the most kind in their rejections. (for the most part, there's always bitches in every category).

A story for ya: (don't I always have one? lol)

I was out with a married couple friends of mine, went to a local nicer restaurant with a bar and small dance floor. We just went out for a bite and drinks.

There was a table next to us with 4 nice looking and 1 incredibly gorgeous creature. I said "oh man, what I'd give to take her home..." the wife says: why not go ask her to dance? I say "she's so far outta my league I need the hubble telescope just to see the league she's in" Oh bullshit she says, go ask her.

So I did. She said to me "you know, thank you very much for asking, but I'm out with my girlfriends and we haven't seen each other for ages so I'd like to just hang with them if that's ok".....WHOA I thought I was going to get "fuck off goof" (like most of the average women do). I said "thank you for that. That was the most thoughtful and caring rejection I've ever heard..., have a good night, enjoy yourselves".....and sat back down.

Not 20 minutes later she walks over, I'll take that dance now......She said to me on the dance floor, I thought you were sweet, and I love this song so I thought one dance with you would be nice....When the song was over, she gave me a hug and wished me a good night....

Now if 1 out of 10 women were that nice I'd still be in the game. But when 99.999% of them are total snots, I forgo the game for my mental well being lol......

 

[trohmaniacs]

Still loving this site!!!

Went on a date last night, worked out really well. Not really my type, but a nice enough woman indeed.

Short version of the story...

She sends me a message, I reply. We message for two days, talk on the phone for two more. I say I'd prefer to meet in person to see if there is a spark, she agrees. Meet at Timmies for a coffee, go out for dinner, have a good time. Ask for a kiss goodnight, end up getting a hand job in the car.

ps, I did not 'play' her. I told her exactly how I feel, that I had no idea where this was going, and we'll have to take it one day at a time. Had a good talk about our sexual preferences, looks like she has as much kink as I do.:whip:

Here is hoping this is the start of being on a roll!:great:

 

[Begum]

better to be on a roll than a bagel, those things usually mean hemorrhoid problems lol....

glad you had a good time, I can't BUY a date on POF lol.....