Comments people make about massage

[HelloCharlieAlphaOmega]

Haha Mel was gonna say

 

[mattle]

Hi,

I agree the minority ruin it for the majority, i spend a good bit of money on my personal health, majority of my treatments are with women therapists, the stories i hear from these ladies is terrible.

A few years ago, we had a fantastic beauty therapist rent space with us, i said if you ever get a problem that you cannot handle, SHOUT. One day she shouted, i came in to her room, this chap wanted a few fringe benefits, i grabbed him and escorted him out of the door, i threw him out on to the high street, it was only after i locked the door, i realised he was still naked. I got his clothes and threw them out of the door, he was promptly arrested by the police, never heard from him again.

Still smile today.

Therapist1960uk

 

[Fitz]

You think you've got problems! I'm listed in the Yellow Pages under Holistic Treatments, Reiki and Reflexology. And I still get phone calls from men wanting a ****k! I've had to change my phone number because of it.

 

[Black Sal]

Hahahaha... that must have been a sight! Weird, isn't it, though, that men still pester legitimate therapists when it's not exactly difficult to find what they're really looking for. (Er, so I've been told...)

Getting back to the original thread, I've got used over the last few years to friends/colleagues joking about me offering "extras". Never come across anyone being hostile, but you do sometimes hear stories about churches that have an odd attitude to therapists.

 

[fbsgkhyh]

RP - laughed out loud at 'knob jockeys' !

Two hoots - I know what you mean about feeling deflated, it's quite reassuring to know it happens to others! In my case it's been other things, but it's still disheartening.

There are certain things that seem prone to producing a knee-jerk reaction from people that they would not have if they knew anything at all about the subject - hence the assertion that a taster session usually produces a convert.
Sometimes people aren't even aware they have a misconception until someone in the know puts them in the picture.
And I've been there too - I thought breastfeeding beyond a year old was quite weird until I met people who were doing it, and had my own child, and read ! I'd just heard the usual comments from others on the subject, and they in turn were just spouting the same old same old that they had heard without questioning.

Your friends will either be converted by your enthusiasm, and perhaps a taster, or they won't - but it won't be your fault. If you tell them it upsets you, and they still can't keep their comments to themselves, then they really aren't the kind of friends you need.

Strange though - I thought generally women saw massage as a luxury treat, linked with spa weekends and beauty treatments!

Good luck with your course x

 

[xheqsuvriknigoecj]

Hi TwoHoots - don't let the comments that your "friends" make put you off. They might acutally be jealous that you are learning something that you enjoy. Don't let them rain on your parade. Are they learning new skills and improving their lives? When I first started learning massage none of my friends made any negative comments. Even if they had I would have ignored them as I knew why I wanted to study massage. In general I tend to stay clear of nay sayers.

Like the person who replied to you first - you are probably now going to attract different people. As a side comment but kinda relevant. I had a male friend who was a bit fo a bad boy (petty crime) in his youth. He decided to study law and found that he had to distance himself from his old friends as he was moving in a different direction and they had limiting beliefs. I always believed in him and encouraged him with what he was doing. He is now fully qualified and I am so proud of him.

 

[~<(8^D) Party!]

well, to the original question i would say - don't argue; smile and let them see and how professional and comfortable you are with your new skills - never explain, never complain as my friends mum used to say.

but, sad to say, men do often get the wrong idea about women advertising as massage therapists. i had one who asked about sensual massage and would i do it topless etc...well, as it happens i had been told about a lady - former page three girl - who does massage topless and she lives very nearby (it's not my alter ego, honest). So, i was GOOD enough to email this fella and he promptly replied "But she charges 160 an hour - whereas you're only £30 - please can you do it"...so, there's the nub as it were...these guys know this market very well and they're trying because they think we the Primark of the w*** massage world.

Think yourself lucky, i once told my EX-builder - who up to that point had been a nice guy - that i was studying massage and he asked if could have a treatment...i said yes...come to the college I'm looking for case studies. on the last day of him completing our work...he - bold as brass - asked if he could take a picture of my boobs on his mobile camera...hence to say I was not topless at the time but in my matronly cardigan plus marks and sparks jeans. sad to say, I pretended i hadn't heard him...

 

[infinityie]

oh goddess, thank you for the giggle,
from a fellow primark massage therapist lol

 

[ding s.]

after studying Holistic massage most people were very interested in what exactly it was and wanted to know more. Some men yes think it is automaticaly a sex service but i think there is a lack of understanding about it. These "massage parlours" do us no favours.

I have recently started doing spray tanning and Ive had some strange texts and phonecalls from men about it. I dont know if thats me being naive but i never thought that was something i would get strange phone calls about.

 

[Starz]

Two Hoots I hope you're feeling better about your new adventure. I have had a giggle from this thread... I've had a few phone calls from men who've wanted more details about my 'head massage' - they skipped the word Indian .

It's always difficult when you take a new direction from the norm. Next time someone makes you feel flat, put it down to their ignorance and offer them a taster treatment.

As long as you're enjoying what you're doing keep on doing it with pride. Welcome to the world of holism.

 

[Poet]

Ahh but it is not only the men that make these calls/emails and texts!

I am a male therapist, my area is mainly remedial and sports.

A client had about 4 sessions (1 a week) she was 44 and I am 25 (just some background info

All going fine, and then at 1.30am one morning I had a text saying along the lines of " Hey, what are you up to? I could really do with a massage, and the hubby is away xxx"

At first I ignored it and was very surprised.. then I got 3 missed calls from her and another massage saying..... well, I wont repeat on here!!

The next morning I had a message purely saying "Sorry.."

Well, I have never seen her since!

I have also had a few other emails from women asking subtle but not suitable questions..


Back to original post:

be proud of what you are doing, as said before, don't feel the need to explain or argue. If you ever come home from what should be an enjoyable night with friends feeling as you did, a serious re-evaluation of that certain friendship needs to be made.



Danny

 

[Free Caledonia!]

With the way the email started off I wasn't to know that's what he was looking for, they see the word massage and probably just think oh good, she does happy endings !

It now makes me wary of every man that rings, texts or emails and it shouldn't be like that.

 

[? ?]

Hi Danny
A night out with the girs and a little too much vino I think !
At least she could sill remember what she'd done the day after to apologise though

 

[lgoamezy]

as an amateur masseur I am surprised about the contact messages I get from men wanting to arrange sensual, extremely sensual or more, massages for their wives or partners. ........................

 

[bellelayne]

I've had a lot of these comments, especially when I was working in, ahem, the back of a barber's shop... Also had a couple of sexual requests - both from Gumtree, which seems to attract all kinds of slightly unhinged people.

I think part of the problem is that in much of our culture, touch is sexualised and touching someone is often thought of as intrinsically a sexual action, unless it's a very cold clinical touch like a GP. I think this is particularly the case for men.

Apparently in the history of Tui Na massage, they decided to change the name from An Mo to Tui Na because An Mo had taken on the same sort of unwelcome connotations that we have been talking about with 'massage'. I think that was in something like the 14th century.

 

[?u??sfloozy]

Really?? Never happens to me!

 

[matthewfein]

Hi, I would suggest as the others have. Ignore your friends comments, poor things .

I have never had the misfortune to have any negative comments about massage, or if I have, I have just laughed and then ignored them. I did my first diploma in massage in 1995 when I was 19, so I am sure I must have had a few comments thrown about (I was a skinny buxom thing!) but again, I just can't remember them!

Another thing I haven't ever come across (and I don't know whether to be relieved or concerned..) is that I have have never, ever had anyone asking my about happy endings or behaving in that way. I do however a note on my website and literature stating that I only have female clients. Not because I don't like giving massages etc to men but because I want to filter out those that do think that a happy ending is an option. Now before all the men on HP start yelling at me (she hides under an umbrella) I DO give massages to men if I know there will be a girlfriend/wife/female friend there on the first meeting and infact do have a regular male client but as a mobile therapist going into peoples homes I am unwilling to feel even slightly uneasy going to or during a treatment. It would affect my massage even if it was just my perception of a situation and nothing sinister was actually occurring.

I actually had a chap ring me yesterday afternoon asking if I could give him a sports massage because he had just returned from snowboarding in Canada. I rang him back and had a chat with him and just explained that I was really sorry but I had a policy not to visit men. I felt bad, not to mention it was annoying that I had lost a client but he was very understanding and said he could quite see where I was coming from. I did say that I wasn't making a general statement about men but it was just my policy.

If I had my own treatment room things would be different. I would know I had my family or colleagues close by and I could be much more flexible but as it stands I have to work in a mobile capacity.

So yes, I am cutting out 50% of my potential earnings but at least I don't get pervy calls/texts/emails!!

Please don't let negative comments about massage put you off. Like someone else said earlier, massage has been around since ancient civilisations were strutting their stuff and if people are a bit too dense to realise it, then they are only missing out!!

D

 

[xrwxhzus]

It's happened again! Bumped into a woman I haven't seen in ages and she asked what I was doing now. I said I'd been back to college and was now a massage therapist and the jokes started!

I have to say she is a professional, well-educated woman and the last person I was expecting to come out with rubbish like this! So shocked was I that I just stood there like a fool! She said "every time I pass a phone box I'll wonder if you have your card in there" and "so you're almost a lady of the night now". I'm sure you can hear her laughter!!

It amazes me how some people have such pre-conceived ideas about massage and it makes me cross that they can be so rude and personal.
I just couldn't think of any appropriate remarks to stop her in her tracks but I did ask her what she was doing now and she said she was permanently tired even though she's only working part-time.

The best I could manage was "you'd be an ideal person for massage then" and I said "I'll drop you a card in next time I'm over here." She said "I'm so exhausted I'd probably fall apart if I was massaged."

Part of me wants to re-educate her and part of me is still very annoyed.
I also think I need to have some witty replies for the next time it happens .... help!!

 

[Tarrochka]

ive not had many bad comments about being in massage.

a few friends have joked whether i do extra's, to which i replied "yes i could charge you an extra £10 if you want " it did wipe the smile from his face

try telling people what you do in a different way, tell people you are a muscular therapist or a therapist in the use of massage

remember there are a lot of us out there, so try and make yourself a bit more interesting from the others.

also be proud of what you do, massage is a valuable service that can benefit people in many ways.

 

[SeverinaStatic]

Hi TH

Just because someone is a professional and well-educated doesnt mean that they are intelligent! Don't let such "educated" morons get you down. Tell them straight that they are a f*** wit and it's about time they wake up and smell the coffee. Like TB says be proud of being a massage therapist, it is a legitmate profession and a growing industry. Sounds like your mate is very unhappy in her life and her work, oh my heart bleeds....

Best wishes

RP