freind cant take massage

dantexvergil

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If anyone has an eastern med point of veiw, Id gladly appriate.
I have a freind who cant take massage, she says when someone tries it is too painful.
She is I beleive around 24-25 and has been a victim of abuse and homelessness, she is also a former drug user if that helps.
She also see's an acupuncturist monthly if that helps any.
Does anyone know what the problem is? and if so how I can help, or if I should try not to help.
 


Sounds like there is a lot of emotional trauma which is coming up during the massage.

A few thoughts. If you work on her, I would stay very far away from the abdomen (probably at least until she can accept about 15-20 full body massages. It has been my experience that even though those with emotional trauma need this work, they can't take it easily (not even the lightest of pressure). As a matter of fact, if you ever start this work on her - begin with a gentle light touch for the first few abdominal sessions and nothing more. --- If someone else has seen the opposite need, I think it would be interesting to hear about that as well.

You could possible start out with 5 min. hand sessions. 2 and 1/2 mins. for each hand and see how she does. Then move into the feet for 5 min. sessions associated with the hand sessions. Then possibly add in forearms and then ankle region of legs. Do that for a number of times before branching out further or until she gives you the "go ahead" sign.

From there you may be able to move into the back (prone).

You'll have to take it very slow, I think.

I hope other people will add to this thread with their experiences. It will be an interesting one.
 


It sounds as if your friend has had a life time full of emotional and physical pain. With a body/mind/spirit philosophy, (Barnes') Myofascial Release would be a perfect modality for her.

In my experience as a practitioner, people who have endured years of trauma are full of restrictions in their connective tissue, and therefore, have significant pain and limited function, etc. complaints. Most have been
diagonosed with several different 'labels' when actually, with each traumatic experience, their body has tightened up to protect them.

MFR releases these restrictions in a gentle way.

There are many advanced John Barnes' Myofascial Release therapists in your area. You may want to check the therapist directory on the website for a practitioner (can't post the site but it's myofascial release dot com--no spaces).

Good luck to you and your friend,

Barbara Long, PTA/MT
 


So, Barbara, would you mind explaining how you would go about working on a client like this. What would your steps consist of? I, for one, would really be interested in hearing more.
 


When I met my husband, he couldn't handle massages either. He had this odd quirk, of when anyone touched his back, he had an urge to protect himself, fist cocked type idea.

I started out with him extremely light, and to begin with no movement. I placed my hands on his shoulders, upper back, and just stayed there, over clothing. When he was comfortable with that, I lifted my hands, and moved them placing them back down. We then progressed to effleurage. Now he can take full massages

Starting out like this may be one way. Start with energy work if she will take it. And then go on from there, maybe even start over her clothng. If she has had a rough life, she may be very protective, and defensive. You will need to work with in those boundaries, until she builds up trust in you as a therapist.

Give her full control, what you do, where you work, how hard, how light, keep in contact. See how it goes from there
 


I am in agreement with Myhrra on the energy work. A really good energy worker can do some amazing things for past trauma. Pueppi's suggestions for starting out slowly are great,too. Here is an article form massage and bodywork magazine:
http://www.massageandbodywork.com/Articles/FebMar2006/missing.html

The Ethics of Touch by Ben Benjamin and Cherie Sohnen-Moe has a lot of info on working with trauma survivors as well:

http://www.theethicsoftouch.com/

If you continue to work with this person, make sure you fully ground and protect yourself, too.
 


I have had several clients who could not tolerate masaage,and Reiki helped so much to release emotional trauma.....but prepare for alot of tears and post session depression. I find that after 2-3 sessions of Reiki will be more tolerent to physical touch. Good luck with things,go slow and follow their body's signals and adjust the session accordingly.Ground yourself well and things should be OK.

Namaste,
Johnny
 


Certain types of Shiatsu can be really helpful too, since they can be done very gently, and mostly energetically, and have the added benefit of being done on a clothed client, which seems to help the client feel a little more protective.
 
freind cant take massage

fey said:
I have a freind who cant take massage, she says when someone tries it is too painful....Does anyone know what the problem is? and if so how I can help, or if I should try not to help.
I have a question. Does your friend want to receive massage? Or is this something you think she should experience. If your friend wants to receive massage, then the advice already given is great. Begin with light techniques that can be done fully clothed. Energywork is wonderful. Then start with hand & foot massage -- using gentle pressure, and progress from there. However, if your friend hasn't asked for your help in this area, I don't think it's appropriate to try to force the issue. Massage isn't for everyone, and that's OK.
 
freind cant take massage

Blisss said:
fey said:
I have a freind who cant take massage, she says when someone tries it is too painful....Does anyone know what the problem is? and if so how I can help, or if I should try not to help.
I have a question. Does your friend want to receive massage? Or is this something you think she should experience. If your friend wants to receive massage, then the advice already given is great. Begin with light techniques that can be done fully clothed. Energywork is wonderful. Then start with hand & foot massage -- using gentle pressure, and progress from there. However, if your friend hasn't asked for your help in this area, I don't think it's appropriate to try to force the issue. Massage isn't for everyone, and that's OK.

You are very correct, I never actually considered that element. Before I continue I should definetly ask.

It sounds as if your friend has had a life time full of emotional and physical pain. With a body/mind/spirit philosophy, (Barnes') Myofascial Release would be a perfect modality for her.

I would agree with you there but I only know shiatsu and some swedish :-(
 


Im also thinking of a little rosen method.
Unfortunetly Im not trained in talk therapy or the specifics of that method but it would be a fun research project.
 
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    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ANNIE SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLEโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒSCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ (647) 891-9688โ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ (416) 291-8879โ˜Ž๏ธ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 9:30am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ”ฅGORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: ๐Ÿ”ฅ Rose๐ŸŒน๐Ÿ˜˜An enchanting and skilled new Asian massage girl, known for her calming presence and soothing touch. With long, silky dark hair and delicate features, Rose exudes an aura of serenity and grace. As she gently guides you thro
  34. #203MoMo&Beauty:
    MoonMoon spa/416 887 8801/8131Yonge st #203 Brazilian girl 23ys curvy body &new Asian girl today
  35. wonderspa:
    . ๐ŸŒบ๐ŸŒบWonder spa,(9421Jane st unit127)call416-5000-800โ˜Ž๏ธbest massage in vaughan,if you need to find a comfortable place to revive your body rexlaing come visit us.4beautiful attendants ,Today and tomorrow RMT available,sexy very young girl Mimi,natural c cup,very good looking ๐Ÿ˜ปTina ,open mind she knows what do you want,๐Ÿ’„very friendly Lucy nice smiling very popular must try๐Ÿ˜ป๐Ÿท
  36. Jennyโ€™s Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’JENNYโ€™S SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…5170 DUNDAS STREET WESTโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ( 647-893-5196)โ˜Ž๏ธCall or Text โ˜Ž๏ธ( 437-888-3759)โ˜Ž๏ธCall Only (ETOBICOKE) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…GRAND OPENING๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅEXCELLENT MASSAGE + SERVICE QUEENS NOW AVAILABLE AT JENNYโ€™S SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ”ฅTWO BEAUTIFUL NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ’ฏREAL PICTURES OF ATTENDANTS๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ”ฅTODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: Julia๐Ÿ˜˜ - A shy new Korean girl waiting
  37. AmoreSpaEtobicoke:
    AMORE SPA 127 Westmore Drive, Unit 106C Etobicoke, ON M9V 3Y6 โ˜Ž 437-688-2407 โ˜Ž This is the only official schedule for AMORE SPA: Tuesday at AMORE SPA: CHERRY(10AM-11pm) & Tiny Spinner LALA CHERRY is a proven superstar, Slim Asian with a pretty face, all natural A or B Cups, long nipples, slim waist & small round bum. Her services are legendary. Tiny LALA is unbelievably good
  38. ASPA:
    TUESDAY at ๐€ ๐’๐๐€: Best Massage Rachel, & Wendy ๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ๐€ ๐’๐๐€๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ, 28 South Unionville Ave, Unit 5, Markham. ๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ๐—–๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต-๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฒ ๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐˜๐—ฒ๐˜…๐˜ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿต-๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿต๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ RACHEL is a slim and attractive attendant, about 5โ€™4โ€ tall with nice responsive 34Cโ€™s and a captivating smooth rounded bottom. She is popular for her excellent massage skills and a little extra.
  39. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 4 young beautiful girls are working today, young fun Ivy with big buttocks 30โ€™s open mind and young sweet Mia 25โ€™s, cute GFE Lina and sexy Coco are providing deep tissue and sensual massage, pls call 416-3985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome, back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North Yo
  40. ForeverWarden:
    Tuesday at ๐Ÿซฆโค๏ธ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŸฅโ™พ๏ธ๐“•๐“ž๐“ก๐“”๐“ฅ๐“”๐“ก ๐“ข๐“Ÿ๐“โ™พ๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐Ÿ”ดโค๏ธ๐Ÿซฆ2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฌ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด๐Ÿณ: Cindy, Tracy & Vivian. Cindy is a slim beauty, 5โ€™4โ€, natural C Cups & wonderfully long nipples. Her massage is nice, her bbbj will drive you wild & her cfs finish is a dream come true. Tracy is an incredibly cute & pretty Japanese/Taiwanese mixed spinner, about 5โ€™1โ€ and 100 lbs. She is very popular
  41. HolidaySpa:
    Tuesday at ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…๐“—๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ข๐“น๐“ช๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough โ˜Ž๏ธ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿต๐Ÿตโ˜Ž๏ธ: CICI, CINDY & JENNY. CINDY is a slim & incredibly sexy lady with a smile that will melt your heart, & an ass that will fire up your spirit. Her services are among the best! Jenny has a medium build, nicely curvy with a slim waist, pretty face, and very flexible skills. Jenny will make you very happy.
  42. SugarLoveSpa:
    Tuesday at โค๏ธ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’œโŽ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—š๐—”๐—ฅ ๐—Ÿ๐—ข๐—ฉ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”โŽ ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜: ANA, MIMI & TIFFANY. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York, ON โ˜Ž ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฑ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด โ˜Ž ANA is a young, short and sweet lady, 5โ€™1 & 105 Lbs, very tight, with a small to medium booty. Ana is a versatile honey who provides great massage, & can accommodate your needs. MIMI is a slim & busty Asian/Euro mix beauty, 50Kgs & 1M60. Mimi has a very versatile range
  43. See You Health Center:
    Natalie she is CBC/filipina mixed Petite school girl Judy is a gorgeous model type Vietnamese Girl She is 5โ€™2โ€tall . 100Lbs, with D Cup Melons Cici Cute Skinny Sexy Vietnamese Girl With Voluptuous Huge C Melons Provides Amazing Service โ˜Ž๏ธ416-988-2950
  44. Lulu_Villa_Spa:
    Sami Gorgeous Model Type CBC Vietnamese School Girl Barbie Very Young, very Petite Korea Student With Perfect S shape type Spicy Smoking Hot Body Great BBBJ, CIM, GFE in Her menu Suki From Taiwan, sweet girl Sexy tight body amazing C cups with Those incredible nipples โ˜Ž๏ธ647- 446-0886
  45. Golden Sunshine Spa:
    โœจClick on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates and special services ! โœ… Today๐ŸŒธSusan๐ŸŒธLuna๐ŸŒธLynda๐ŸŒธKandy๐ŸŒธJazmin Call us โ˜Ž 905 - 265 - 2158โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate service awaits! โœจ
  46. Soul Relax Spa:
    โœจ Looking for a relaxing escape? โœ… Meet๐ŸŒธNina๐ŸŒธClaire๐ŸŒธCamilaCall us today for the best treatment and service experience. Click on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates ! Call now โ˜Ž 289 - 298 - 5662โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate relaxation awaits! โœจ
  47. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix blossom Spa โ™จ๏ธโ™จ๏ธโ™จ๏ธtable shower ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘body scrub๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน5124 Dundas W Etobicoke โ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366 Nice girl Luna is joining. She can provide a very good massage with sensual touch. She knows how to take direction and please a man. Lisa ๐Ÿ˜˜can provide deep Thai massage. She takes directions very well. She has many assets and knows how to use them. Come see her today.Welcome to walk in or make an appointment at any time. Plenty of parking space at the back door
  48. EMSpa_schedule:
    Tomorrow's sneak peek: For Tuesday November 12, 2024, our attendants will be Ada โค๏ธ, Cici ๐Ÿ˜, Yoyo ๐Ÿคฉ, Ivy ๐Ÿ˜˜ and Christina ๐Ÿ”ฅ Call us at 905-479-6668 to book your favourite!
  49. Sunrise Health Centre:
    ๐Ÿซฆ Yoyo has joined Angela & Noor for the evening ๐Ÿ“ž๐Ÿ“ฒ (647) 325-8086 ๐Ÿ’ฆ We have Hot & Sexy Girls Every Day. ๐Ÿ’‹ They all do Extra Services & are Very Open-Minded ~ Drop In Anytime ๐Ÿšถโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿšถโ€โžก๏ธ Walk-Ins Are Always Welcome! Unit 27, 10 East Wilmot Street, Richmond Hill
  50. Newspring@:
    Nu spring spa โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ”ฅsexy hot Latino ๐ŸŒธSingapore ๐ŸŒธKorean girls working at Markham โ˜Ž๏ธ416-669-8508โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ”ฅ7-15 Karachi dr Markham
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