WOWbrandywineWOW
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- Jan 27, 2010
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Ampoliros, My honest advice is as follows:
You made a mistake as much as she did. You are a student in Danmark indeed and have your own worries with your family, scandal ect. You also are fortunate enough to live in a country where you do not have to marry her to bring her to Denmark. You do need to live with her. In Denmark she can get good antenatal treatment, she will even get money in the form of "bidrag" when she has YOUR child. That child is half Danish and is YOURS, that child deserves the best you can give it as a parent, just because she is carrying it makes it no less yours.
To me there is no issue, you need to get her to the Danish embassy in Lao and get the papers moving asap, I would even call immigration in Denmark yourself and try and speed things up. Just as she needs to tell her family and face consequences so to do you. It may be hard but as I said, you made a mistake just as much as she did. Could you really live knowing that you did not entitle your child to the best medical care it could get before it was born and then left it in a country not knowing the conditions it was being brought up in? Just sending money is not an option, in my mind. The beauty of the Danish system is that you can bring her to Denmark, live together for a couple of years while you see how things go and also can help her with the baby and also bond with your child, and if things do not work out she has the option of staying having also been able to adjust to life in Denmark, learning the language customs culture etc.
I really hope you take this advice and bring her to you where she can get better care for her and YOUR unborn child. But in this time make sure you let her go and learn Danish in the FREE classes offered in Denmark, if things do not work out this will be invaluable to her in terms of increasing her options to stay and make a life for herself and your baby. It will also be good if she stays as she will then also be close enough for you to participate in your childs life.
You may be "only" 24 but many parents have been a lot younger and had a lot worse circumstances and done a great job raising their children.
Now go get her an opholdstilladelse! Let us know how you get on!
You made a mistake as much as she did. You are a student in Danmark indeed and have your own worries with your family, scandal ect. You also are fortunate enough to live in a country where you do not have to marry her to bring her to Denmark. You do need to live with her. In Denmark she can get good antenatal treatment, she will even get money in the form of "bidrag" when she has YOUR child. That child is half Danish and is YOURS, that child deserves the best you can give it as a parent, just because she is carrying it makes it no less yours.
To me there is no issue, you need to get her to the Danish embassy in Lao and get the papers moving asap, I would even call immigration in Denmark yourself and try and speed things up. Just as she needs to tell her family and face consequences so to do you. It may be hard but as I said, you made a mistake just as much as she did. Could you really live knowing that you did not entitle your child to the best medical care it could get before it was born and then left it in a country not knowing the conditions it was being brought up in? Just sending money is not an option, in my mind. The beauty of the Danish system is that you can bring her to Denmark, live together for a couple of years while you see how things go and also can help her with the baby and also bond with your child, and if things do not work out she has the option of staying having also been able to adjust to life in Denmark, learning the language customs culture etc.
I really hope you take this advice and bring her to you where she can get better care for her and YOUR unborn child. But in this time make sure you let her go and learn Danish in the FREE classes offered in Denmark, if things do not work out this will be invaluable to her in terms of increasing her options to stay and make a life for herself and your baby. It will also be good if she stays as she will then also be close enough for you to participate in your childs life.
You may be "only" 24 but many parents have been a lot younger and had a lot worse circumstances and done a great job raising their children.
Now go get her an opholdstilladelse! Let us know how you get on!