in love with a bargirl... big question here

[ElDub]

But some of them are happy in the company of gay men- they feel 'safe':intello:

 

[Ejr]

she's annoying but i do like her music
i would go see her show 5555

 

[This is insanity!]

that's what it's all about, she dosen't want to work in a bar, sleeping with fat smelly falang, she wants you're money and you to take care of her, straight forward really.

 

[thatswhatshesaid22]

OMG.. stop sweating it, take it as it comes, be careful (as much as you can) and who knows, maybe itll turn out ok. If not, what have you lost??

To answer your question, MAV did have a similar experience and after 7 months discovered his girl was, in fact, a katoey. After the initial shock he came to terms with it, set up the RTG factory and his husband is now the QC director. A happy ending.

Me? Came to LOS over a year ago for a couple of weeks, still here and still living with my gf who I met week 1. Maybe not permanent but, I live for the day.. you could do the same.

Good luck

 

[Arwen]

I am English - Just crap at it.
If you feel hard done by, then I am sorry if I called you and Idiot.
The reason is - You are a very angry person and not listening to the help you are getting on here. People are trying to help you and you are just getting annoyed with them. Maybe becuase English is not your first language you are not understanding them. Thats not their fault and also not your fault.
Just carm down OMG - You are new to all this and just have learned the hard way. You now know what you are doing and will learn from all this.
Like I said enjoy Thailand and just relax and have fun.
But remember this one thing and dont get Pi55ed off at me.
Take Any BAR Girl from any bar in Bangla - And you will need to pay her, even she if does to ask for Money.... I may be wrong, but this it what I have read.

Take it easy mate...
All the best

 

[tiggermom1218]

Why am I not surprised? Have you bought the Sex In The City dvd yet? 555

 

[Sherozzel]

Ok, its been like 12-13 days we are together and still, i haden't give her 1$.

Sounds like you're proud of that! You do realise she has obligations to send money home every month?...hence the tears that she had only made 1300baht in 13 days.

 

[reeloendort]

Let the idiot be fukced over by his girl...

 

[Leanin]

OMG has taken a little flak over the non payment but to to be fair, has pointed out he's a newcomer to Thailand. At the same time I'd point out to OMG that the majority of board members will have the girls's best interests at heart when pointing out to someone 'you should have payed', rather than it being anything to do with jealousy that someone can get ladies for free.

I'll say something about payment for OMG's, or any other newbie's benefit, based on my own and other experiences I've read over the years. Some points may have been said already, apologies in advance if so.


To start off OMG said this...



Well, on reading that I can't actually see any clear evidence the girl was expecting him to 'cough up money' as per the usual expected scenario.
I think the money side of things can sometimes be a grey area and not always cut and dry.

Reasons being that some girls are heavily sponsored and may put out for free with holidaymakers they genuinely like the look of, just the same as many expats get freebie's from sponsored girls. Many expats I have known on various boards love nothing more than to rub sponsors noses in regarding that fact.

The only time I would personally take issue with someone not paying these ladies what they are due is when it is quite clear the lady was expecting money in return for the bedroom gymnastics performed, and that the guy in question clearly avoided payment, this is not the case here as far as I can see as OMG went on to say that this girl continued meeting up with him and still didn't mention money, yes some girls are shy to ask and I've certainly listened to many complaints from girls over the years, but in my opinion most bargirls with sense rules: ) don't go with that same guy again for round 2,3,4 if they were in fact expecting money.


Then he went on to say this...



Other than the fact the paragraph above also mentions that she continued meeting him, it also mentions he was starting to fall for her charms, a common scenario as many people know.
So it may just be possible this girl was glad of his company and wanted to show off this handsome man to all her friends, it may be this girl is 'thinking outside the box' and could be angling for the possible life changing option where girl meets boy, boy obtains visa, girls joins boy in farangland and supposedly live happily ever after, so many other possibilities here too, they are only 2 examples.

Now in the case of girls expecting money but too shy to ask, or guys ruthlessly kicking the girl out next day without money, then yes they deserve to be berated.
But I do know it to be fact that countless girl and ladyboys often sleep with good looking guys for free, many have told me this themselves, they may have made enough money already that week/month, they may have 1 or several men sending money each month via bank accounts or western union.

When I first starting visiting thailand I wasn't offered a freebie even once, but strangely in the last few years I've had plenty of offers, girls shouting at me in the street that they will 'f**k me for free' or another sexy beer bar girl on my last trip said as I walked past, 'for you, everything free in Thailand'. I stopped and asked her if she was serious at which she seemed adamant she thought I was 'hansum man' and not wanting anything other than good fun.

As flattering to my ego as it was, I have not taken a single girl up on these offers, this is because I remind myself that these girls have families to support. Even though they may be genuine when they say they don't need the money, I still think they are daft to put out for free, almost like they have forgotten the very reason they are there in the first place.

I can tell you that if I was a bargirl myself, it wouldn't matter if I had 10 sponsors and the guys walking up to me looked like David Beckham, I would want to maximise my profit as this business is usually not exactly a long term career option.

Which brings me back to girls with 'sense', I've encountered girls that can see further ahead into their future and make as much money as possible, with long term goals in mind like saving the money obtained for a small business, beauty salon, small shop etc..
But I've also encountered girls that can't see any further than next week, day, minute. These types don't seem to realise the true value of money, spend it like dish water and are possibly more likely to be the type that put out for free, although I could be wrong.

My own personal opinion, as we are talking about prostitution, regardless of how that much line is blurred between customer and 'friend', or 'lover', guys should always make the effort to ask any girl if they expect money, what I just said doesn't apply to guys who intend to offer payment anyway of course. So if you want to do the 'slip into handbag in the morning method', then up to you. But if you don't intend on paying for sex in Thailand, then checking first is the least anyone can do. And if you get the green light for free fun, then all power to you. :

 

[Froggy McFrogfeet]

haha, this tool is a pro poker player, i guessed it when he said: i lost 700 at work today and was pisst, how many jobs do u really lose money in ?, now he is posting graphs to show how balla he is. I know this cuz im poker pro too.
Dude u have shitty software and if u cant pay the ***** u suck at poker.

No hate tho, live it up : )
Im comming soon too, gonna be mad fun...

 

[Diddy]

Taylors are very nice guitars. A nylon string guitar is like a woman who is sweet, and kind, treats you well, and is easy to get a long with. The kind that you know you would be better off with.

A steel string guitar(acoutic) is like a woman who is feisty, not easy to handle, and sometimes will hurt you, but she is sexy, and passionate, and gets under your skin. The kind who will always be a little difficult, but you know you want her anyhow, and it is easy to get hooked on her, because she's got soul. Especially if you use the heavier gauge strings. I like Martin medium gauge strings.

 

[Ya-Kno-Im-Riight...]

OMG
You have obviously found a very special and truthful lady.

Stay believing that and go with the flow........maybe after it ends you'll be alot wiser or it.......or if it doesn't end you'll be very happy anyway.

Either way its a win win so enjoy the ride.........and most importantly keep us imformed.

Good Luck
Gateway

 

[Isabela]

Be honest OMG - you're an idiot mate - grow up, get a real life, and move on.
At 24 you think far to mutt with your 'small' head and not your brain - you're running around after one girl in a place with hundreds - dont worry about paying 10,000baht cos you can get a good one for 1000 to 2000, but this time make sure you pay them in the morning and send then home, the same as all us cleverer older guys do .......:rules:

 

[Deedee]

i really like her version of "river deep mountain high" actually!

 

[Keira]

Celine Dion can sing well... but she looks pretty rough!

Apart from her I love French Canada... Quebec City, Montreal... great places. Girls are hot there too...

 

[elle.]

She has to go back to the village for 5 days to finish school??!! What's that about??

More like get you back there to meet the outlaws. I think you've been wrong in not slipping some money in her purse before leaving you and going to the bar even if you don't have much money...she is working and will be having to send money back to the family which you have to bear in mind if you take her on as a girlfriend...money still has to be sent.

 

[Double Bubble]

Entertaining stuff. Do continue to post your romantic conquests.

Sounds like those young lovelies in Patong don't stand a chance with you about.

 

[SJG]

OMG, Christ knows what you are going to do with all of this advice, however I suspect, as was noted in an earlier post, that you are waiting for the "right" answer, one which suits you.

So here is the bottom line: -- go out and enjoy a good time with the lady and see what transpires. The best case scenario is that you have a great time and maybe find a great lady. The worst-case scenario is that you will have learned something.

Neither is life threatening, so loosen up and "just do it".

 

[203]

He will keep testing her to prove something.. In the end her needs will mean she resorts to what she knows.. He will then feel she is a 'bad girl'.. And they both will come away thinking badly about the other person and by extension all people that fit the category..

He will have a 'all Thai girls are *****s' mentality.. And she will think all farangs are full of promises and dont take care.

 

[shyshay87]

Poker player :rofl: ...I can see that he has a poker face when dealing with BGs... don't good poker players have great control of their emotions?

I'd say more likely he plays some sort of stock market...