Mistakes to Avoid

[Lushbabe4ever]

We've all been to massage therapists we didn't like for some reason and chose not to go back. I thought it would be helpful to have a thread where we share our experiences of "what not to do." I'm hoping this can serve two purposes. 1. It gives people a chance to vent. (Always fun :wink: ) 2. We can learn from each other by identifying mistakes that are easy to avoid.

Often, I've heard colleagues complain about not succeeding in this field due to uncontrollable obstacles (gender, saturated marketplace, etc.) I fully acknowledge those are very real challenges. However, in my experience, they can be overcome. The things that prevent success long-term are usually behaviors that are within our power to change. That's why I'm putting this in the Business Section of the Forum. Success comes from more than just advertising and putting together a great discount package. Repeat clients are the key.

So, as a client, what turns you "off". What make you say, "I'm never coming back here again"?

 

[Abu]

If the sheets smell even ever so faintly of rancid oil... never again. Bleh.

I once had a MT who got comfortable enough with me that she started cussing during the massage. Not "d*mn," or "crap," but F*** and S*** and other stuff. I don't want to hear anger from my MT because I respond to it and can't relax, even if I know it's not directed at me, and even if I agree with the opinion.

Too much pressure. If I say "that's too much pressure," and you don't back off, sayonara.

Please don't try to hug me after the session. I understand alot of your clients like to be hugged, but I am not one of them. Be alert to my cue. When I extend my hand for a handshake, don't brush it aside and hug me.

Please don't disparage other methods, therapists or treatments, alternative or medical. Discussion is one thing, saying they are not effective is not your call. What works for one person may not work for another, and vice versa.

Please don't tell me how burnt out you are, and how much you don't want to do massage, or how much you hurt and need to get out of this line of work. When you say these things, I can't help but think I'm getting the bottom of the barrell massage from you.

Don't badmouth my neighborhood. I was at a gem faire this weekend, looking at some beautiful jewelry. The woman at the booth was disgruntled because it was slow for her, (most people at these shows are after mineral specimens, large spheres and polished stones, or beads for their own crafts.) As I was looking at the jewelry, she looked right at me and said: "Nobody is buying my stuff. Women in Oregon have no class." *AHEM* I am a woman in Oregon. You just insulted me. Hmmm... not buying what you're selling anymore. Likewise the therapist who complains how much she hates my home state and wishes she was elsewhere. I LOVE my state, and if you badmouth it, it's like you're talking smack against a member of the family!

Please don't glop me up with oil and not give me a towel to clean up. Please don't deliberately massage a bunch of oil in my hair without asking if it's okay. I might have somewhere to go after the massage. Please don't use Biotone on my (I'm allergic) after I request that you don't, because you say you're "just going to use a little right here. A tiny bit won't hurt you, it's hypoallergenic."

Those are just a few reasons why I won't return to a therapist. :?

 

[VasileZalupu]

The MT not doing an intake to find out what's going on with me and why I'm there in the first place.

The MT not checking in regarding pressure.

The MT disregarding my request for them to back off or increase pressure.

The MT disregarding the areas of which I request specific focus.

The MT having bad breath.

Post-massage: MT not asking how I'm feeling or even giving me some water.

 

[Khan]

I agree with the one's mentioned before:

Defintely a therapist who uses too much pressure and won't back off. Or are bad a judging their pressure.

At home offices - those with pets that bark and make noise (birds) through out the massage.

Those who smell of cigarettes or food odors.

Those who say they do a certain type of work, but don't when it comes down to it. I have encountered this a lot with deep tissue - they weren't even close.

Asking for an area to be focused on and not getting it. :x

Certainly - rancid smells or dirty places. There better be a clean bathroom too.

Therapists that are not on time or chat too much.

Rooms that are cluttered and not easy to move in.

 

[Green Man]

This topic was started on the PERFECT day!

Had a massage by an MT 2 months ago. I had to cancel my second appt with him. He asked me if I wanted him to call me back to see when I was available...I said no I will call you. I never called him but in the past month he has called me twice. First time it ticked me off today when he called not once but twice in the SAME day he infuraited me beyond belief. So advice ,when a client says not to call them DON'T!!!! Because I told him I would call him when I had free time not to call me and he did anyway I will never get another massage from him nor will I ever refer anyone to him.

 

[jimbot]

Do not smoke before my appointment. It's a deal breaker.
Now, being more assertive as a client I will end the session the next time it happens.
Robyn

 

[Pompal 09.]

this is such a great thread - thank you - you're brilliant!

the amazing thing to me is that i find myself sometimes forgetting these things .. and it horrifies me. but maybe i'll print these and keep 'em because it's a good reminder. just yesterday, a client left and i thought, 'oh my gosh, i didn't even offer any water!' i felt terrible.

anyway, these are good reminders and thanks for sharing.

the thing for me, the big pet peeve, is the LMT talking - my sessions are usually silent, with room-encompassing music that really facilitates an out of body experience. and if any noise whether it be hyper music, noisy pump bottles, talking, loud pants or shoes disturbs that, it jerks the client (or me) back into reality.

i also really hate it when the top sheet is lifted way off of me as i turn over. makes me feel super exposed. oh and another, when the LMT actually lifts my leg up to drape the sheet underneath it. i can't help but wondering if my leg is too heavy and if they'll hurt their back.

amanda

 

[kpk]

An MT talking way too much about themselves during the session. (This is my time, not yours.)

Going too deep or not going deep enough.

Cutting down other modalities that you know nothing about.

Doing moves as if you either don't know how to do it or are not sure of how to do it. (It makes me wonder if you really know what you are doing.)

Music is too loud or the noise from some thing else is way too loud.

 

[heather06]

Oh I have another.... not using enough lotion sometimes and it feels like you are ripping my skin off!

And massaging my face when I have make up on and I have to walk out with it all smeared.

 

[Mujer Alta]

Yeah, too loud music. Remember placement of the stereo. I play my music very softly, last week I laid down on my table while the music was still going, and realized that the speakers are positioned very close to the head. Even at a very low volume, the person on the table is hearing medium volume.

There is a MT friend who sometimes uses my space in the evening. He turns the music up pretty loud, I'm guessing he doesn't realize how loud it is for the person on the table. :shock:

 

[Rouge Kiss Angel Tattoo]

The one I'll never go back to started with a fist to my piriformis.....so the first touch was very painful! :shock: She then talked through the entire massage about her son's marriage troubles and her own very short marriage to a "double-crossing, cross-dressing SOB"......

It's a wonder I went on to massage school, after that one!

 

[Amerie]

hot stone massage thing to avoid - stones dripping with water, resulting in a horrible oil and water mix on the body, once the stone is gone, the water cools down, YUK, sort of defaets the purpose of a hot stone. It's probably something to do with working with lukewarm stones, otherwise the stone would be pretty much dry. using warm stones for placement that are too hot to lie on bare skin and refusing to put a sheet between skin and stone because ït interferes with the energy of the stones".

sweat dripping on me, particularly on my face - the rest is yuck, but on the face is YUCK!!!!

Uncomfortable tables

Going waaaaaaay over time. I once was booked in for a 90min massage. She ended up doing 150min, she had no-one else scheduled, and lost track of time It seemed like it was going on forever, and once I made some comment about how dark it was she realised how much time she'd gone over and then it was all panic stations because she was meant to meet her boyfriend at the movies, all scheduled to fit in nicely with me having the planned 90min appointment. I should've been wary as soon as she said she usually allowed one hour between clients.....

Downlight positioned over my face, even dimmed those things are bright...

Loud music on one side only, actually any music on one side only - I find very directional sound quite off putting - speakers at the head or the foot of the table OK, but speakers just directed at one ear, I don't find relaxing.

Coughing and snuffly nose sounds when there are 2 hands in contact with me (and only one therapist)

Highly scented rooms - I am allergic to some insence, not sure what exactly, but I come out in hives and have trouble breathing, I go somewhere where insence is burning and I have to wait to find out if I am going to react or not, 99% of the time I am OK, but that 1% makes me nervous 100% of the time around smelly stuff (says she the aromatherapist!)

 

[Timmy the Dog]

I agree - don't go overtime without getting permission from the client first. And than, permission only means it's OK to go a little bit over (5-15 mintues). Don't double the length of my appointment. I always schedule massages for myself for a 90 minute massage, because that's my favorite. I've had therapists turn that into 3 hour massages. (No exaggeration). Now, you may be thinking, "Why on earth would she complain about getting that much extra free massage?" Two reasons -- one time the therapist was awful and I wished I had only scheduled 1 hour. Secondly, even if the therapist's great and the table's comfortable, my body doesn't do well lying in one position for that long. A 3 hour massage causes more tension for my body than it releases. (Oh -- and by the way Melb -- I leave one hour between appointments, but I don't work overtime on my clients. That hour is rejuvenation time for me and me alone. :wink: )

Commenting on Shannon's earlier post about the MT who kept calling her (unasked) to reschedule her appointment. I also hate any form of high-pressure sales associated with massage. This can be related to rescheduling me or trying to sell me products. I don't mind if you ask me if I'm interested. I do mind if you try to force it or go into some big sales pitch when I'm all relaxed after my massage. I had one MT tell me that my body was in the worst shape he had ever seen and I needed a daily massage. If I couldn't afford that - at least weekly, and he said he wouldn't let me leave until I had rescheduled my next appointment. Did I reschedule? NO WAY!!!! After that obnoxious conversation, I refused to see him again or refer anyone to him.

Expanding on the scent issue that Melb already brought up: Always offer unscented oil or cream, and don't try to convince your client that scented should be fine because it's only "mildly scented." I don't know if other people are like this, but my body intensifies a scent upon contact. What that means is that I'll smell the bottle -- it will smell nice and mild, so I'll agree they can use it. After the massage, the scent is far stronger coming off my skin. Within 30 minutes it's like I've been doused in scent. (My husband will attest to this. He sends me straight to the shower if I come home from a scented massage!) This happens to me whether the scent is perfume or natural essential oil. So, respect your clients when they request unscented and don't try to convince them otherwise. (I know better now; I'm very firm in this request when I receive a massage).

The last one I'll mention is: KEEP ME WARM! I received a Lomi Lomi massage in a room that was about 65 degrees. For those of you who don't know much about Lomi Lomi, there's a lot of oil used, so the client's directly on the vinyl table (no bottom sheet). Draping is minimal (read: almost no covering at all). This style of massage was originally done in ancient Hawaii in caves with fires roaring. The room should be close to 80 degrees. My therapist has a space heater with an automatic thermostat. She set it to 80 degrees, but here's a little secret, folks: Those thermostats don't work. The heater turns off when the heater itself reaches 80 degrees. The room can be still be 50 degrees.

On the flip side of that, my husband would say KEEP HIM COOL. He can't stand to be hot -- makes him very cranky. For him, having a fan on during the session is essential. I keep notes on each client's temperature preferences. Some want blankets and heating pads throughout the summer. Some want lightweight sheets and a ceiling fan on in the winter. Everyone's different.

 

[Josselyn]

I'm with Bliss on the temperature thing. I can't relax when I'm shivering. On the opposite end, there's those therapists who load several heavy cotton blankets to make you feel "secure". Except the weight is suffocating and they have to endlessly fuss with all the layers.

Clean sheets, clean room, clean bathroom and reception area. Uncluttered rooms, please!! All those useless knick-knacks just collect dust....and I can't fully relax in a messy room. I just can't. And please, when you finish a session and have downtime before the next one, if you aren't going to make up the table immediately, then CLOSE THE DOOR. Passing treatment rooms with the sheets all wadded and rumped as if someone just got up, though it was hours ago, really unsettles me. It just really looks unprofessional and careless.

FOLD your sheets for storage. I once had a therapist proudly tell me he "never folds, too much trouble" and then actually showed me his linens literally wadded up in balls in his cabinet! That certainly explained why his table was an uninviting, unclean-looking crumpled mess. And really cheap, scratchy sheets, too. Of course, this was an indication of what care he took in his work: downgrading other therapies, complaining about income, sexism against males being unfair and hurting his business, using way too much pressure and never letting up after repeated pleas, and a host of other obnoxious behaviours.

DO NOT SMOKE. Please refrain from stinky foods. You might brush your teeth or wash your hands, but it's in your pores and every fiber of your clothing, too. And my unfortunate nose can smell that.

Highly scented anything. I remember an exerpience with "Kiss my Face" patchouli...yes, the sample smelled mild enough, but I had a roaring migraine before I got home.

Please don't place anything, oil, your cell phone, whatever, on the table with me. Either keep it on the floor within reach or use a holster.

Please don't chew gum. It's really distracting. If your nose is runny, take something to clear it up. If you sweat excessively, use a neck towel or slip on a headband after you enter the room to start working.

Don't run over without checking with me first. Please be on time. I don't want to start my massage time worrying why you aren't there.

Please add padding to your table. Even the extra-plush ones (which I use) benefit from at least great-quality fleece over they vinyl. The skinny ones that feel like batting over plywood really need at minimum an eggcrate foam layer. Three or four inches of thick foam makes an enormous difference, especially if you want me to lie there for a long time.

Don't lift the sheet up vertically when it's time to flip. Not only does it release all the cozy warmth, but it feels very exposed. Lift it just enough so I can flip without getting tangled. And unless your room is very warm (85 or more degrees) a towel just won't cut it.

No lights in my eyes, please, no whale music, don't continue to chat whith me after I stop answering. Don't cuss, discuss politics, religion, the economy, or the state of your business/love life/health with me. Please do an intake, but don't make me fill out the equivilent of an application for Federal employment, either. You don't need to know anything about my physicians, my spouse, or my insurance.

That's about it!

I do keep lighter sheets and reposition the fan for the men who can never feel cool enough. I find using a cream or lotion, which feels cold on the skin anyway, is also favored by these folks. For the chillie-willies like me I always use oil...creams are just sooooo cold.

 

[superstup]

For the chillie-willies like me I always use oil...creams are just sooooo cold.

Not if you warm them up! I have a miniature crockpot I used to warm up my cream. I keep a spare in there as I work, and switch them 1/2 - way through the massage, so the cream's always toasty. (Makes it easier to spread, too).

That brings up another thought -- COLD HANDS. YEEEK! Make an effort to warm your hands before a massage. That first touch is so important. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten goosebumps from icy cold hands on that first contact.

I also agree with everyone who said DON'T speak disrespectfully of other forms of bodywork or medicine, including conventional medicine. I find people in our field are pretty negative about regular doctors and conventional treatments. Even if you feel this way, DON'T share this opinion with your clients. If people have a problem, they're going to do everything they can to get it fixed. Sometimes that means a regular doctor's intervention. I was seeing an acupuncturist for knee trouble. He spent most of my appointment giving a monologue against the medical establishment. When I told him I was also seeing a physical therapist to strengthen my knee and an orthopedic physician to assess for injury, he flipped out. He told me the doctor would hurt me and that physical therapy helps no one. His skill at acupuncture was fine, but that attitude and that speech made me leave his office and never return. I also told the colleague who referred me to him. She said she wouldn't refer to him anymore either. He lost a lot of business that day.

 

[chrissybabie]

Oh...one more thing. Don't brush your cold metal belt buckle, or any part of your groin, against me when you're working. I am astonished how many don't pay attention to this.

I've had several MTs use heated lotions on me, but the warmth quickly dissapated after the initial stroke. So between that and worrying about heating product making it go "off" sooner I don't bother. Bliss, I'll have to give your method of cooking creams a try. I only use pumpable creams, for obvious hygenic reasons, and they should fit nicely into my baby crock with no worry about water getting into the pump. thanks! :

 

[tahco]

oh, adding to the whale music, bubbling brook music - a whole CD of water trickling does make me think of the bathroom.
I confess I had a CD with a bubbling brook for less than 1 min about 45min into the CD, just a bit of a transition between tracks, I thought it was OK. I got a new CD and asked for feedback from a few regulars who had been exposed to the 1min of bubbling brook CD often (not used every appointment, but it does come out quite a lot), none had commented previously that the 1min of bubbling brook was an issue for them, 4 regulars all made comments that they were glad there were no bubbling brooks in the CD, it also explained to me why those 4 would be quite alert at the end of the massage sometimes - they probably wanted to go to the bathroom for the last 15min! I'd never associated the CD with the alertness. It's such a good CD I'm going to have to see if I can burn the tracks in a different order so the bubbling brook is very early, but it has transitions between the tracks, so I may not be able to

Clients don't always complain about something, sometimes they don't even identify it enough to be able to make a passing comment, but somethings can jar them back to reality from the treatment table.


And another vote for rancid oil being really off putting. Also the smell of burnt oil - make4s it smell like a take away food joint.

 

[Pompal 09.]

Well, heres what happened to me yesterday. I made an apt. with someone I have not gone to before. In school we need one professional massage per term. Doesn't have to be someone different but I want to experience a few different people. So made my appointment, got there and theres a note on the locked front door (retail space) saying the receptionist is out and will return shortly. My appointment time came and went and since I had scheduled on a busy day for myself I knew by the time we did paperwork etc. I would not be out on time to get to my next errand unless I got a shortend session. After 10 minutes in I left after trying to call the number on the front door. I would normaly not be so ansty but I have a lot going on right now. I think you should not assume that your appointments will have the time to wait if you are running late. I would have appreciated a call letting me know he was running late and being given the option to not hop in the car and make the trip there. In his defense he called later in the evening and did apoligize and offered me a free 30 minute session. It was a eye opener for me though to make sure when I do start practicing to schedule enough time in between.

 

[Pompal 09.]

I make sure to carry my appointment book home at night and have the clients phone numbers in the book next to their appointment time.

This way, in case something happens, I can at least try to get a hold of them.

I ran over (it sort of crammed under my truck) a mattress on the freeway that flew off another car on the way to work a while back and couldn't get to work no matter how bad I wanted.

Having the numbers and a cell phone with you, does help.

 

[Marykate]

Thank you Melb for your last post which shared a mistake you made yourself. It reminded me how much easier it is to point out other people’s mistakes than admit my own. So, in the spirit of admitting that I’m far from perfect myself, and that I learn from my own mistakes as much as anyone else’s, here’s one from my personal blooper reel:

When I started massage school, I was thrilled to discover massage cream. The glide of an oil with the absorption of a lotion – who could ask for more? I had no negative skin reaction to the cream, nor did my fellow students. So, when I started my massage practice I used cream exclusively. My clients also loved it. Then, 3 years into my practice, I had a new client arrive and tell me she was allergic to coconut. I looked at my cream ingredients and saw that coconut was a major one. (Turns out most creams have a coconut oil base). I had nothing else to offer!!! Luckily, our local health food store sells massage oil and is only one mile from my office. Also luckily, I had scheduled extra time for her massage, since it was her first appointment with me. I asked her if she would mind waiting while I ran to the store to buy some oil. She was gracious. I drove like a bat out of hell, ran through the store, grabbed some oil, hauled *ss back to the office and tried to slow my heartbeat to get into a relaxation state for her massage. Thankfully, she loved her massage and was impressed I was willing to buy oil especially for her (rather than unimpressed that I was unprepared to begin with.)

Since then, I’ve had 2 more clients with coconut allergies and a few people with skin sensitivities in general. I still love massage cream, but I keep jojoba oil available for the people who need it. Lesson learned!