On quality of touch

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I was thinking last night about "quality of touch" and wondering what mine feels like to other people. I thought about bodyworkers I know well and how I experience their quality of touch.

I think I experience quality of touch as a full expression of who the person is at that moment, strengths, challenges, and all. So M's quality of touch is sweet and beautiful, but sometimes a little shy, because that's how she is. And A's quality of touch is so deeply caring because she really is. And C's is, well, distracted and a little unpleasant/unhappy because that's how he's being in the treatment room.

It reminds me of this amazing way my shiatsu teacher basically said it, about how everything about us, including our attitudes and our daily lives, becomes the quality of our touch.

What do you think?
 


Ego,

I agree 100%. There are several therapists I go to for massage. All have a different touch and vibe. H's touch is strong, vibrant and energetic, this is who she is and her touch is perfect for her style of work. J is confident, calming and nurturing, just the thing when I need pampering. O is caring, nurturing and very empathetic. She floats through our massages and takes me with her.

I believe the quality of touch of all these great therapists is a reflection of their personalities and who they are inside. :)

I sometimes wonder how my quality of touch comes across to my clients. My style isn't for everyone, but I do have my regulars so I must be doing something right.

I do love this work. :D
 


I think I want to take a class from your shiatsu teacher.

everything about us, including our attitudes and our daily lives, becomes the quality of our touch.

absolutely! That is why it is so important to be grounded and present ~ to learn how to hush our "monkey minds" (from my TCM teacher) to be devoted to the care of the client.
 


given that you believe quality of touch is about us (the therapist), our lives and out attitudes. Do you think it is possible to change someones quality of touch? Can a person make their quality of touch better?

Patrick
 


As individual as we are (which is why we are each drawn to different modalities) doesn't the way we massage and the vibe we send out, boil down to how skilled (confident), focused, and professional we are in each massage?
 


I've wondered about this myself. I've also wondered if I recieved a massage from another massage therapist who did it exactly how I do it (which is fundamentally impossible), would I enjoy my/his/her work? Sounds kinda esoteric and quantum...but just a thought. Fortunately, I also have 'my regulars' so I must be doing something right (hopefully).
 


Patrick W said:
Do you think it is possible to change someones quality of touch? Can a person make their quality of touch better?

Yes - just as you can change your attitude about a given person or situation. Just as you can improve your handwriting or artistic talent. Just as you can improve your connection with your loved ones.

And just as these things can be different on any given day or even a given moment, it is the totality of who & where you are at that moment that convey your intent.

Intent is the most important tool we have in our possession.
 


What a cool question! Just thinking about recent experiences with others, I observe the M is brusque and business-like, J is thoughtful and confident, and D is relaxed and soothing.

I know that when I'm not focused and in the moment I worry about the quality of touch I give. Sometimes when I am doubting myself I need to take a deep breath and slow down, and then I can get back into my groove.

Gaspen, I'd love to get a massage from myself so I can experience the good and the bad! What better way to improve technique! Alas, until we can replicate ourselves I guess it ain't gonna happen.
 


Too true, Ella. Besides it would be a little more than freaky to be receiving from myself. Goosebump time!
 


Do you think it is possible to change someones quality of touch? Can a person make their quality of touch better?

Didn't yours improve in school? :-) Given that, my answer is of course yes, absolutely.

And judging not only by the responses here but also by the conversation I had with my rosen practitioner today, I'd guess that if someone wants to improve their quality of touch faster than simply by working and gaining more and more experience, the two things they can do are:

1) put intention into improving their quality of "being" during every session (whether they need to focus on more presence, more confidence, or more or less of something else) and 2) work on their own stuff, actively :-) Whether that's becoming less shy and more assertive, or more confident, or more open minded, or less judgmental, etc.

I've wondered about this myself. I've also wondered if I recieved a massage from another massage therapist who did it exactly how I do it (which is fundamentally impossible), would I enjoy my/his/her work?
Ohhh my god I so I want to receive the kind of massage I give! LOL. I want to receive my old low back protocol! And now that I've taken Orthomassage, I want to receive that too!

But now that we're talking about quality of touch, I think receiving my touch would be like looking into a very clear mirror... might not be ready to see everything that clearly! LOL
 
This is just what I needed

Hello Ego and All,

This is a great post. Whenever I need guidance and insight (which seems alot lately), I come to this site and search. I have been looking for insight on "flow" and came across this post. Perfect.

I have been struggling the last year to start my practice over and supplement by working in local spas. It has been a tough journey and I am learning alot. In my massage demos, I have been so nervous that I have compromised my "flow" and it has been noted. I KNOW that I have the skills to give a satisfying massage- my old practice was always full with regulars, so I couldn't understand what was going wrong with these demos. I still am searching but it seems like my nervousness has kept my work from being in the present. The testing has me thinking in the future and it is keeping me from truly doing the work in front of me.

I read your Rosen post too and it brought me back to my Rosen experience. I only had 4 sessions (my therapist moved) but they were so powerful and productive. Maybe I should get more Rosen work for this phase of my life.

I too wish that I could feel the difference in my regular massage and 'test' massage. Oh, I hope there is a difference!! I am inspired!

Thank you!
 


Now I wonder if my quality of touch feels like a melted candle. I've been burning one at both ends for the last two weeks! :lol:
 


EgoMagickian said:
Do you think it is possible to change someones quality of touch? Can a person make their quality of touch better?

Didn't yours improve in school? :-) Given that, my answer is of course yes, absolutely.

And judging not only by the responses here but also by the conversation I had with my rosen practitioner today, I'd guess that if someone wants to improve their quality of touch faster than simply by working and gaining more and more experience, the two things they can do are:

1) put intention into improving their quality of "being" during every session (whether they need to focus on more presence, more confidence, or more or less of something else) and 2) work on their own stuff, actively :-) Whether that's becoming less shy and more assertive, or more confident, or more open minded, or less judgmental, etc.

I've wondered about this myself. I've also wondered if I recieved a massage from another massage therapist who did it exactly how I do it (which is fundamentally impossible), would I enjoy my/his/her work?
Ohhh my god I so I want to receive the kind of massage I give! LOL. I want to receive my old low back protocol! And now that I've taken Orthomassage, I want to receive that too!

But now that we're talking about quality of touch, I think receiving my touch would be like looking into a very clear mirror... might not be ready to see everything that clearly! LOL


What a terrific post and very helpful comments. This will give me something to think about and work towards for sure! thank you!
Savannah
Student of Massage Therapy
 


I've also wondered if I recieved a massage from another massage therapist who did it exactly how I do it (which is fundamentally impossible), would I enjoy my/his/her work?

One of my trade friends told me that she thinks that is what we do....we tend to give the massage that we think we would like best. I think that we might in theory, but how would you know until you could experience it? I think that it is something that we subconsciously strive for....
 


Right.. a very valuable thing, I find, is to to learning sessions with two other MTs... teach one of your moves/techniques to A, using B as a demo, until B reports that you and A are doing the same thing. Then, let A do the technique on you. Now you know how it feels.

This is time consuming, but can be used to learn a lot, and refine your work.
 


EgoMagickian said:
Right.. a very valuable thing, I find, is to to learning sessions with two other MTs... teach one of your moves/techniques to A, using B as a demo, until B reports that you and A are doing the same thing. Then, let A do the technique on you. Now you know how it feels.

Yes! We often do this in my shiatsu class. When someone has a question about a technique, the teacher will do it on their partner, then they do it on their partner and the teacher gets the partner to give feedback. This is very helpful.

-- Joshua
 


Great Thread!

I recently had a client that came back to me after a years absence. She told me in a rather frank way that my massage had gotten much better, more confident. I really appreciated the feedback acknowledging to her and myself that I had grown more confident in my work and how I approach my clients and let go of wondering if my work was satisfying enough for the recipient.

It takes great courage, and much self-reflection to master the art of massage. Everything we are, including the things we keep locked away in the corners of our being, are transmitted through our touch. I feel it is essential for bodyworkers to practice some form of meditation and/or centering exercise to even out our dispositions before a massage. The goal of my work is to leave the recipient more balanced than they were when we started the session. How can I possibly do that if I am not balanced myself?

In Peace and Light
 
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