Sardarji Jokes Part 2 (No Offense)

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An Indian Software Professional has given a great lesson to Pakistani hackers by hacking their official site.

Santa: What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots!
Banta: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair of the same at home.

Santa: What is ANOTHER difference between a MOSQUITO and a FLY?
Banta: A FLY can FLY but a MOSQUITO cannot MOSQUITO!

Banta: When did George Washington die?
Santa: Two days before his FUNERAL

Banta: Tell me five FERROCIOUS animals you can think of...
Santa: 3 Lions and 2 Tigers.

Banta singh was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area. The judge asked him if he had anything to say in his defense. "They should not put up such misleading notices", said Banta singh. "It said, FINE FOR PARKING HERE."

Santa singh and Banta singh were always boasting of their parents achievements to each other.
Santa singh: Have you ever heard of the Suez Canal?
Banta singh: Yes, I have.
Santa singh: Well, my father dug it.
Banta singh: That's nothing, have you ever heard of Dead sea?
Santa singh: Yes, I have.
Banta singh: Well, my father killed it.

Banta Singh got tired of being the butt of jokes and decided to do his PhD. Banta was looking out for a unique subject to write his thesis when he saw a cockroach. Banta placed the cockroach on the table and cut one of its legs. Then he said, "WALK". The cockroach moves forward. Then Banta cut its second leg and commanded, "WALK". The cockroach manages to move forward. Then Banta cut its third leg and commanded, "WALK". The cockroach manages to wriggle forward on one leg. Finally Banta cut its fourth leg and said, "WALK". The poor cockroach could not move and lay helplessly on the table. He repeats the same with over 1000 cockroaches. He finds that the results in all his experiments match. Banta is jubilant, "NOW" says Banta "MY THESIS IS READY" and proceeds to write it. "WHEN YOU CUT FOUR LEGS OF A COCKROACH IT BECOMES DEAF".

Sardarji got the 4th child. He fills data in the birth certificate "Mother: Sikh. Father: Sikh. Kid: Chinese." "How come you write "Chinese" when both parents are Sikh?" "Aah, Sardarji read a newspaper, it says that every 4th person born on the Earth now is a Chinese."

Two Sardarjis are in a railway station.
"Can I take this train to Ludhiana?" asks the first.
"No," answers the RR man.
"Can I?" asks the second Sardarji.

A sardar goes to a barber, shop wearing Walkman headphones. He tells the hairdresser: "Cut my hair please, but do not remove the headphones." The hairdresser does his job but needs to get under the headphones to finish his work. He removes the headphones thinking that the sardar will never even notice. The surd falls to the floor, chokes, turns blue and dies. The hairdresser picks up the headphones to see what he was listening to and hears: "Breath In, Breath Out, Breath In, Breath Out..."

Two surds go fishing. They catch a lot of fish and return to the shore.
The first surd says: "I hope you remember the spot where we caught all those fish.
"The other answers: "Yes, I made an 'X' on the side of the boat to mark the spot."
"You idiot!" replies the first. "How do you know we will get the same boat tomorrow?"