bhai bura math manna I had to put few bytes into your ears in a non lecture way reading your story. You are young, single and have the whole life ahead of you. This murky world of dance whores will swallow you in no time ; it is like fighting against the gravity and you cant. Only reason I am not sucked in as I have family ( constraints) and too many anchor points without which I would be mongering like riding a bullet train without brakes which is approaching a brick wall fast. Make your career and mingle with real girls in normal bars and experience real feelings, love and relationships. Go to gym, bulk up in 6 months, get a cool haircut, buy some fashionable clothes and try to strike normal conversations with real life girls - just innocuous ones to start with. Always have a smile on your face. sooner or later you'll break through my friend. Best of luck bhai.
I can correlate..
My school days, even talking to a girl was like "pap"
Where in as a normal guy i would get attracted towards girls, i used to stay alone most of the times as my parents used to fight as shown in movies i didn't know how what where to talk
I never had confidence in me, i was surrounded by agri community friends so i turned to their culture since i could see fights at home as well as outside
I couldn't dare to talk to a girl but i could abuse them.. Wondering what was i?
I never had a gf in college days but i could see my friends have. I used to be jealous.. I even slapped my friend for roaming with a girl i like
He was like tu tila hello pan nahi bolu shaknar i love u kay bolnar..
When i started earning, in my first job i couldn't speak to my female collogues.. Where in they were friendly they put hand on my sholder n stuff but i couldn't
Then i had a decent looking gf whom i met on fb
I couldn't speak to that girl on my first meet, i chated with her on fb, even though she was sitting in front of me
(now look at me, i can talk to anyone)
1 year relation
Broke up
N i started going to kishor from 2010 i couldn't talk to zarna that day i still remember.. I even cried on her sholders. Lol..
I was that dumb that i said to waiter santosh muje aap mat bol I'm younger to u
Bars gave me little confidence that i can talk where in i can say anything n nothing is impacting me
Only thing i regret is i used to spend money wisely untill last 2 years..
Last 2 years i spent huge amt i visited some bars almost daily.. N drunk like anything.. It was addiction.. Highly regretted
I still get nervous when i talk to my boss or any beautiful girl
Things i learnt
1. U can be nervous.. Its okay.. Even sachin tendulkar gets nervous against shane warne
2. Don't show that ur nervous.
3. If u can't judge any situation or need time to respond.. Just smile..
4. Ignoring is a better option.
5. A part from my spending in bars, if i look back, in case i didn't do well but i definitely did not do bad
6. Work on urself, wear decent clothes, build physic, if u have physic anything will suit u
7. Work on ur conversations.. U can try some videos on Utube..
8. Jada hero nahi baneka.. Being normal helps in long run
9. In case u don't get a gf, u definitely get good girl to marry
10. Money doesn't matter in real life, that doesn't mean u dont need money.. One should know how to make money n how to spend
12. Talk in the favour of the person, like if a girl who likes shahruk khan.. U have that topic to start with..
13. Bat karne se bat banti h..
14. Give time to family n friends
15 give time to urself