All this story reminds me so much of some nights I spent in Patong a few years back. Actually, I went through this whole rigamarole with one girl, then with another later that same tour. With the first one, like OMG, I liked the occasional night off from partying, and her bar was only about a 3 minute walk from my hotel. So we make plans for her to come after closing. She calls me 15 minutes before closing, and says she is coming. Then it's after two, she is on the way, but having a drink with a friend first, then, 30 minutes later, she is coming soon, then it is 4:00 and she is not answering the phone anymore. I was pissed and went out looking for her. Found her with some of her loser friends a few blocks away. A couple of Thai guys and a LB passing around a bottle of cheap whiskey, all of them too blottoed to even see straight. Her mind was way beyond being able to think about anything, like where she was supposed to be, or the fact that I might be pissed off. The next time it happened, I didn't even bother looking for her, and she called in the morning, all apologies and tears, and I took her back.
When she was sober, she was a nice girl, very sweet, not bad looking, and had a simply amazing body(fabulous tits, long, long legs), was about 23 yrs old. The next time I took a night off, she called at closing, and said she was on the way. I said OK, but if you don't show up, don't bother calling later. She didn't show, called in the morning again, but I didn't answer. She called that night, and said she was sorry, it would never happen again. I was with another girl, and told her that I liked her, but didn't want to see her again because she was a hopeless alcoholic. It actually hurt to let her go, but what choice did I have?
The girl I took up with after that one, was very feisty, crazy, and not as sweet. Not as good-looking, either, and extremely jealous, but great in the sack. She pulled the same disappearing act on me several times. At the time, I thought maybe she was with other guys. But after having really gotten to know her, and thinking about everything that happened, my conclusion was that she was probably partying with Thai guys the times she disappeared, and that sex or money had nothing to do with it.
Because there is something about when they get together with their homeboys and homegirls, and the whiskey is flowing. They just kind of merge into some kind of group consciousness, and seem to lose their self-control. They don't have the willpower to break away from the group.
I have never been a whiskey drinker myself, but I have seen the effect of Scotch whiskey on some of these young girls. The only thing I can compare it to is the effect of heroin or cocaine. I can remember times when I was young, and hanging out with the guys and maybe I was supposed to be hooking up with my GF, or going home to my wife, when we would be sitting around a table doing lines of coke, and there was just that group vibe of feeling good, kind of cruising, kind of an escape from all the pressures of life, the feeling that all the shit that happened yesterday doesn't matter any more, a great sense of relief, and the feeling that tomorrow is a long, long way off, so no worries there, either. It is a feeling a time being suspended, and the relief from anxiety, and the good feelings of friendship shared are so strong, that you can't break away, and you just put all your responsibilities on the back burner, and the moment feels too good to go.
Then at some point, you just crash, lose consciuosness, and then wake up the next morning, going, "oh, oh, WTF?" I don't think that it is about money or sex. I think it is about being part of a group that shares common experiences, feelings, culture, and values. It's about partying, and purging anxiety, and pain. About connecting with your peers in a way that you really can only do with them.
Of course, I could be totally wrong. But if she was with a farang, I don't think the back and forth messaging would have gone on as long as it did. When they get that drunk, it is not usually about the money any more.