Open Marriages

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So if a married man tells me his marriage is genuinely open and being kept together for practical reasons, are there things I can watch for to let me know if he's lying?

I have no problem with Married if it's a real open relationship, in fact it seems rather ideal. But I don't want any part of sneaking around and being someone's secret. I haven't actually met the man yet, and usually I'm pretty good in-person at knowing if someone's lying...I might not know exactly what they're lying about or why, but I can usually sense the Untruth in the air.

But in this case I have to acknowledge that so far, I find this man completely intriguing and I want what he's saying to be true, so my own judgment could be skewed by that. So I have to be careful to pay more attention to actions than words, but what should I be watching for?

I have been told the only way I can be sure is to talk to the wife, and that the odds are she would probably have a very different idea about the status of her marriage. That's not an option, I'm not doing that.

Any advice?
 
That is the only 100% guaranteed solution.

Why is that not an option?
 
I've been spinning that very question in my head...I think it seems I'd be getting too close to the situation.

Or maybe I just don't want to find out she has a different idea about the state of her marriage.

sigh...I try really hard not to let what I want come before being smart about things, but I think I feel my IQ dropping with this one. :no:
 
Having an ''affair'' with a married man is getting close to the situation as it is, so I would think it's best to do everything in your power to find out exactly what you are getting yourself into.
 
It's most likely he's lying about his marriage being open, put the onus on him to prove it.
Can you meet him in his home or is that off-limits for some reason? That's where the evidence would be.

Good for you that you're being respectful of his wife.
 
Fuck it, call him at home. If he is going around lying about it he may as well enjoy the benefits.
 
When I was in an open relationship, I received a few emails from some women who were the sweeeeet polite type, mostly asking my permission to spend some time with my man. No they didn't need to do that but it was courteous and sweet I think. If they have the right kind of relationship, she should take it the right way. Just ask for a non-confrontational means to communicate with her. If he's lying, he could try and fake being her but I hope you know enough about women to figure out when it's a guy pretending to be a girl.
 
I think u have to talk to the other partner to know the truth. But I donno if that is a good idea
 
I know, you're right. Thanks.

I'm was hoping for a way that didn't involve the wife.

It's not often I trip over one who makes me stupid.

Then again, online chemistry doesn't always mean real-life chemistry, so I could be thinking about this for nothing.
 
His home would be totally off-limits because I wouldn't be okay with that even if his wife invited me. That's where his children live, where his family lives, and I wouldn't feel right crossing into their world.

I know it makes more sense that he'd be lying about it, but I really hope he's not. sigh.
 
:lol:

I see the logic, but if he's lying, it's not my problem or my place to clue his wife in. While the "enjoy the benefits" aspect gives me a momentary chuckle, this is a real family that could be damaged, and I don't want to contribute to that.
 
Wow, Amy, thank you. This is a most interesting idea, and it's very helpful hearing it from the SO side.
 
That's a good idea to have his children and their environment off-limits if he's just a fuck buddy.

I think Amy's suggestion is smart, tell him you would feel more comfortable asking his wife's permission.
 
I don't really think it is, but Amy has me reconsidering.

Thank you all for the input, I appreciate it.
 
Just couldn't take my word for it could you?! :roll: :tongue:

**sigh** :arf:

As with ALL the "fidelity/ infidelity" threads on escort boards, one thing remains consistent... and that is that one can find all sorts of ways to "justify" in their mind right from wrong, but the only opinion of what is acceptable/ unacceptable and therefore the ONLY one that TRULY matters is what the spouse thinks. Only way to know that with 100% accuracy is to ask the spouse.

The definition of what is "cheating" is subject to interpretation from couple to couple and even individual to individual. :ouch:

Take my own situation for example. I have sex with other women, and Mrs. CG has sex with other women... she also (as it turns out now, has had sex with another man...) Most "normal" definitions of "cheating" would classify this as questionable activity in the realm of "fidelity"... HOWEVER, the difference is, we each have given each other approval of said consensual sex acts, and were even in the same room.

Taking this one step further, Mrs. CG also has full approval from me to pursue any sexual encounter with another female, as long as I have full disclosure. I, in turn may also pursue a sexual encounter with another female provided she is included and also has full disclosure. (i.e. same room)

So, in closing- the definition of cheating in OUR case, would include anything that we know our partner would not approve of. (e.g. if she pursued a sexual encounter with another female and did not advise me, or another male, or if I pursued a sexual encounter with another female in which she was not included.)

This being the case SG... the only way to know for sure, is to contact the spouse... in some way... Some have suggested e-mail, but even THAT can be faked, (very easily I might add), and even telephone can be easily faked TBH... so face to face is the most preferable method to be 100% fool proof...

Sorry SG, but that is the bitter truth. :shock:
 
Well I didn't really like your answer.... :tongue:



Face to face is not gonna happen.

I'll see what kind of a vibe I get if I meet him, and decide from there.

hahaha I said "if" like there's a question about it. Situations like this are why I swore off men for the first year after my divorce...sometimes, Heat makes me stupid.

Guys aren't the only ones who think with the little head sometimes. :neutral:
 
Just cuz you didn't like it, doesn't mean it was wrong... :lol:

See....

You are ALREADY trying to justify it to yourself! :na:
 
I hate how right you are.

The other day I found myself thinking if he is sneaking around, he's gonna do it whether it's with me or not. Wife would be better off if it's with me, as I genuinely have no interest in stealing her husband. I just want to borrow him sometimes.

That is Grade A Primo Pathetic Justification, I can't even begin to deny it.

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Ummm why not just walk away?

Then you could go about your life with a clean conscious......or (and I use this a LOT) would that be too simple?

No matter what his situation really is, you are in fact entering into what is commonly called a "love triangle" and the news is full of them turning out badly.....

BTW: I'm sure you know this, that the net is full of married men finding a little something something on the side and ALL of them say "they're in an open marriage". The odds of you finding one that actually is? Well, I'd play the powerball lottery because the odds are probably greater of you winning that than this guy actually telling the truth....
 
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  35. wonderspa:
    wonderspa: ๐ŸŒบwelcome to wonder spaโ˜Ž๏ธ416-5000-800,L6a4H8๏ผŒwe have 4young beautiful girls working everyday,open long weekends ensuit shower available ๐Ÿ…, friendly nice girl Sunny providing deep tissue to relax oil message back walking hot stone and nice body slide,๐Ÿ…big big boob sexy face Joey is very good looking,amazing ending,really popular,must try๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ
  36. Jennyโ€™s Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’JENNYโ€™S SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…5170 DUNDAS STREET WESTโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ( 647-893-5196)โ˜Ž๏ธCall or Text โ˜Ž๏ธ( 437-888-3759)โ˜Ž๏ธCall Only (ETOBICOKE) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…GRAND OPENING๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅEXCELLENT MASSAGE + SERVICE QUEENS NOW AVAILABLE AT JENNYโ€™S SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ”ฅBEAUTIFUL NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ’ฏREAL PICTURES OF ATTENDANTS๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’‹Limited Time Special Promotion๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’‹ โœ…๐Ÿ’ฆ30 Minutes Nude Massage
  37. wilson holistic centre:
    ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•Beautiful Korean girl Anna working at 382 Wilson Ave ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ416-840-0071โค๏ธโค๏ธ
  38. Spa in Markham:
    GOLDEN FLOWER โ€“ 8380 Kennedy Rd, Unit C6, Markham ๐Ÿ“ž 905-258-0777 / 416-688-6886 ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ JULIE (Vietnam), ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ SONIA (India), ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ AMY (Vietnam), ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡ฐ JOJO (Hong Kong, 9PMโ€“2AM) ๐Ÿ“… bit.ly/flowers_schedule โšœ๏ธ bit.ly/bookinggoldenlove
  39. FLOWER Spa - BLUEXADO | Thornhill | VAUGHAN:
    BLUEXADO FS โ€“ #06-1102 Centre St, Vaughan ๐Ÿ“ž 416-357-9797 / 416-678-8668 ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡ฐ CICI (Vietnam/HK), ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ LUXY (Philippines/VN), ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ SHERRY (Vietnam), ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฌ CANDY (Singapore) ๐Ÿ“… bit.ly/flowers_schedule ๐Ÿ bit.ly/bookingbluexadolove
  40. FLOWER Spa โ€“ PINK | Scarborough | TORONTO:
    PINK FS โ€“ 3300 McNicoll Ave ๐Ÿ“ž 416-299-5515 / 416-817-3839 ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ท ELINA (Iran), ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡ฐ JOJO (Hong Kong), ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ MIKA (Vietnam), ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ด MEGAN (Colombia) ๐Ÿ“… bit.ly/flowers_schedule ๐Ÿฆฉ bit.ly/bookingpinklove
  41. wilson holistic centre:
    new girl works at ๐Ÿ’‹535 Evans Ave today ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ416-531-6969โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ
  42. Lulu_Villa_Spa:
    Cici Cute Vietnamese Girl Judy is a gorgeous model type Vietnamese Girl Natalie she is CBC/filipina mixed Petite girl Sami is a gorgeous model type Vietnamese Girl โ˜Ž๏ธ647- 446-0886
  43. Nu spring spa888:
    ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒนsexy hot Singapore ๐Ÿ’–Filipino ๐Ÿ’– Korean girls ๐Ÿ‘working at Nu spring spa๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹โ˜Ž๏ธ416-669-8508๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน
  44. Annie Spa:
    Gorgeous Young New Tight Korean Butt Yumi working with Sexy Young Sweet Summer and Sensual & Pleasing Busty Boobs Coco today. Call or text 647-891-9688 or 416-291-8879โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธโœ…โœ…
  45. ForeverWarden:
    Sunday at ๐Ÿซฆโค๏ธ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŸฅโ™พ๏ธ๐“•๐“ž๐“ก๐“”๐“ฅ๐“”๐“ก ๐“ข๐“Ÿ๐“โ™พ๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐Ÿ”ดโค๏ธ๐Ÿซฆ2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฌ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด๐Ÿณ: Jennifer, Sophia & Cindy. Jennifer is a tall, slim & pretty Asian babe with natural melons and eraser nipples. She is very open minded. Come and give her a try, and youโ€™ll be sure to come back for more. Sophia is a sweet & pretty Chinese lady with natural B Cups and an awe-inspiring smooth rounded ass.
  46. HolidaySpa:
    Sunday at ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…๐“—๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ข๐“น๐“ช๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough โ˜Ž๏ธ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿต๐Ÿตโ˜Ž๏ธ: Amy & Fiona. AMY is an attractive young lady with larger breasts and a nice bottom. She has outstanding oral skills, and is very popular. Donโ€™t miss out on her special skills! FIONA is a slim hottie with long dark hair, great melons and ass, and nice services. ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…HOLIDAY SPA๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด 3517 Kennedy
  47. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 4 young girls are working today, young sweet Molly 25โ€™s with big buttocks open mind and young pretty Lily 25โ€™s with curve body, young flirty Ivy with 36DD curve body open mind 30โ€™s and cute GFE cute are providing deep tissue massage, pls call 4163985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome,back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  48. AliceSpa:
    SUNDAY at ๐—”๐—Ÿ๐—œ๐—–๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”, 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต๐Ÿด-๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿด๐Ÿต๐Ÿด. Alice spa has 3 beauties to choose from today. Open 10am to 9pm: CLOUDIA (10am-9pm): is Vietnamese, young, petite 5'2" & 96 Lbs, B Cup, best rim deep bbbj cim. $40 Room Fee + $80 (incl bbbj & fs). +$20 for rim/cim. Excellent open minded services. LINA (12:30pm-9pm): is a young Hispanic girl, hot body, C Cups
  49. SugarLoveSpa:
    Sunday at โค๏ธ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’œโŽ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—š๐—”๐—ฅ ๐—Ÿ๐—ข๐—ฉ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”โŽ ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜: ANA, CHRISTINA & HANA. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York. ANA is a young, short and sweet lady, 5โ€™1 & 105 Lbs, very tight, with a small to medium booty. Ana is a versatile honey who provides great massage, & can accommodate your needs. CHRISTINA is Spanish, C Cups, 5'3", tall & nice curves, very open minded. HANA is slim
  50. Lilyspa1:
    Lily Spa : ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฐ100 hh all in๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฐ โค๏ธโค๏ธ SuSu ( Asian )Slim , ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜Porn Service ๐Ÿฉท๐ŸฉทElena 22, Latino French, 36 DDD and ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘ASS, ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹Mimi 24, Asian mixed White , very open-Minded , ๐Ÿ˜ˆbbbj , DFk ๐Ÿ”ฅDuo ๐Ÿ”ฅ,โ˜Ž๏ธ 6475318288
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